Tossers!
 

I have a desk calander that gives me a mostly useless piece of information everyday.
But I found this welcome news and thought there may be others that will appreciate the information... ;)

http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1187973286.jpg

I wonder if medical insurance covers 'artistic' m..m..m..magazines?
Now if I can just find the 'Submit New Thread' key...

Why do they call it mas-turbation when your doing it by yourself? :p

Because at any time there are millions of folks doing it as well. You just can't see them flogging the hog, yanking the crank or slapping the monkey.:D

You forgot "punchin' the munchkin"..

If that theory is true, I should never get prostate cancer! :D

ROFL!!!! Bwahahaha!

"21 times a month"?

I'm going to have to setup my efforts:D

A lawyer friend calls it "badgering the witness." :D:D:D

Waxing the dolphin.
Shakin' the White Out.
Pullin' the goalie.

Polishing the Bishop.

Hooboy, it's euphemism time at PPOT.

Chokin' the chicken.
Beatin' the bishop.
Spankin' the monkey.

and my personal favorite:

Shaking hands with the unemployed.

Feeding the ducks...

Waxing skinny
Priming the purple headed missile
flog the donkey...


Next......

Something for the ladies...
3 Point Shot
A Night in With the Girls
Airing the Orchid
Auditioning the Finger Puppets
Beat the Beaver
Beating Around the Bush
Brushing The Beaver
Carpet Bumping
Checking for Squirrels
Clam Bake for One
Cleaning your Fingers
Dialing the Rotary Phone
Digging a Trench
Doing your Nails
Dousing the Digits
Drilling For Oil
Engaging in Safe Sex
Erasing the Problem
Fanning the Fur
Feeding the Bearded Clam
Fiddling the Bean
Fingerbating
Fingerpainting
Finger Blasting
Flickin' the Bean
Gagging the Clam
Genital Stimulation via Phalangetic Motion
Get a Lube Job
Get To Know Yourself
Get a Stinky Pinky
Going Mining
Groping the Grotto
Greasing your Hips
Grissle Rub
Gusset Typing
Having Sex With Someone you Love
Hee-Haw with wrinkled Mee-Maw
Hitchhiking South
Jillin' Off
Jocelyn Eldering
Let Your Fingers do the Walkin'
Levy Break Limbo
Making Soup
Manual Override
Muffin Buffin'
Nulling the Void
Paddling the Pink Canoe
Pearl Fishing
Pet the Petunia
Polishing the Nugget
Polishing the Peanut
Polishing the Pearl
Play Poker
Play the Clitar
Play Couch Hockey for One
Play the Silent Trumbone
Pushing the Button
Riding the Unicycle
Rolling the Dough
Rubbin' the Nubbin
Rubbing the Donut
Slapping the Mackerel
Soaking the Whisker Biscuit
Spelunking
Spearing the Bearded Clam
Squeeze the Peach
Strumming
Strumming the Banjo
Surfing the Channel
Teasing the Kitty
Teasing the Tuna Taco
Testing the Plumbing
Tickling the Taco
Tiptoe Through the TwoLips
Toggling the Bit
Tossing Pink Salad
Trolling the Bermuda Triangle (Hope you don't find any aircraft in there!)
Two Finger Taco Tango
:eek:

Twenty one times a month is that all...

You forgot "taking the pink tugboat to tuna town"

Tom Waits has the line 'taking advantage of yourself' and 'making the scene with a magazine'
Jim

Tickling Yoda behind the ears

Fortunately, I was not eating or drinking anything when I read this, or would certainly have aspirated something. I have a new euphemism, "workin' on my prostate health" If this thread holds up we can make a top ten list

Burping the worm

Fishing for trouser trout

Giving Yul Brynner the High-Five