the other side of customer service....

[vash]

i will be the first to admit, i am quite possible the schittiest customer service person on the planet. i am very cynical, and VERY sarcastic. the two qualities make me so. it isnt my fault. my second foray into college, i had to work at my parent's restaurant to pay for it. i was horrible, and should have been dragged kicking and screaming from the building before being tossed into the unemployment line. i couldnt help it. some customers are just plain idiots. i mean, how do you answer a phone call, when the person asks, "what is your phone number?" my answer of "hit redial" sucked i know. what do you say to the lady that comes in with six kids and steals all the stuff from the table? salt, pepper, all the utensils...i said,"hey, thanks! do you always bus your own table?"

or when this huge body builder comes in. he looked like a superhero. buffed. he ordered rice, and steamed broccoli. he had this smoking hot woman with him. i took his order and said, 'ok, is that it?" he gave me this look and said, "yea, i watch what i eat, so i dont start looking like you". WTF? i had my physics books out studying. i said, "oh yea? what is the inverse of tangentX?" he gave me a blank look, and i said something like, "your muscles are not the only thing you need to workout, crack a book fool". he left, and i ate his dinner.

i know, i know. i need to learn patience, and i know i am sometimes the idiot customer...i apologize. i know my limitations. i stay away from customer service.

i know you guys have some better stories...let's hear em.

[NICKG]

i am actually enjoy getting the arseholes..and i do, the phones are programmed to ring me first. I use the old turn lemons to lemonade approach. I do what I would want someone to do for me..and honestly i am VERY unreasonable sometimes. Rarely will a customer be unhappy if i help them... but i would hate to be the guy I call when i am mad...

[Tobra]

If someone is rude to me, I am not happy about it, but will turn the other cheek. If they are rude to my staff, they are no longer welcome. You made muscle head look bad in front of his date, party foul!

[Palum6o]

When I was in college, I worked at the local Sears in the hardware dept. I think it was September and the store decided to begin their Christmas display. I always thought how rediculous that was since it wasn't even Halloween yet. Well, I was the lucky one they picked to work the Christmas stuff. We got no customers at all - except for one. It was unfortunate, I admit, it wasn't smart of me, but I had fallen asleep sitting in a chair after several hours with no activity - most likely hung over. The customer had to wake me up to purchase her Christmas lights and was very upset with me. I think she then created an uproar with another sales associate and soon afterwards I was fired. I think I must have said 5 words during that whole thing. Its ok, retail was never my thing.

[legion]

My wife used to wait table at Olive Garden before we were married.

She had one regular that would ask for her and insist on being set in a booth during dinner (busy) time (by himself), order only a coffee, insist of free biscotti, stay in the booth for 2-3 hours, and tip a nickel if anything at all. Sure, he only spent $2, but he routinely got $5 of free biscotti with his meal. If he had not been sitting there, she would probably have had two families of four through there in three hours and made $20 - $40 in tips off of them.

She also loved the people who let their young children run free through the restaurant--often causing wait staff to drop whole tables worth of meals as they ran in front of them.

Then there was the guy who would get there at 4:30 for dinner and park his Jaguar sideways across three parking spaces. He would scream at the hostess if his table was being used--apparently it was supposed to be kept open at all times in case he decided to drop by. He would always find something wrong with his meal, always demand to see the manager, always get his meal comped, and always stiff the wait staff.

[masraum]

I worked retail for a few years at an auto parts store. I've probably forgotten lots of good stories. I'm the same, not ideally cut out for customer service.

I remember one time, this guy comes in and says, "I need a starter for a 1976 Pontiac Firebird with a 400ci V-8."
I stood right in front of him, punched it in, and in less than 60 seconds was handing him a starter.
When I handed him the starter he said, "Is that a starter for a 1976 Pontiac Firebird with a 400ci V-8?"
I paused for a second, and said "No! It's a starter for a 1983 Chevy Chevette with a 1.6liter 4 cylinder, why?"
Yeah, you can imagine that things went down hill from there. He proceeds to tell me "I wanted a starter for...."
My response was "Did you ask for a starter for a ....?"
He said "Yes!!!"
"Well, then that's what I got for you."

I'll try to remember more.

[Jims5543]

I work with realtors.

Need I say more....


I learned an old trick when dealing with a combative customer. Simply ask, "What can I do for you?"

Then listen to the silence, they normally just want to fight with you, but when you ask that simple question 1 of two things happen, a solution to the problem is presented on their terms, or there is a long silence as they try to figure out what they really wanted besides a fight.