Chuck, you're a nut. And reading your posts give me a headache, but they're often amusing.

oh you think im NUTS??????????????????????

well once upon a time in a land far far away and a long time ago................

we had another dezert rat amigo who had a 500 KTM monster whose name was jesse. jesse was a REPTILIAN. ya know the kind of guy if it was COLD BLOODED it cohabitated in his house with him. you name the reptile and jesse had it in a terrarium. well jesse got real good at this. and got to know a bunch of herbitologists here who "milked" rattlers for their venom for hospitals. this is a honest to god true story.

well anywayyyyy............jesse one nice hot summer evening after werk on friday at garrett conned us fellow dirty bikers into going with him to collect snakes with the deal of "FREE BEER!" now who in the hell living in arizona would turn that deal(?) down????? not us rocket scientists!

well the deal was struck. and the next day at about 2pm on saturday we headed out to wickenburg(Vicken-burg to us- out Vickenburgh vay). well "out vickenburgh vay" is the VULTURE MINE! one of the richest gold mines in the history of the state.

since gold found at the vulture mine, the incredibly intelligent miners of the day figured it would also be all around the vulture mine. and them being miners, and doing what miners do best..............blew the HELL out of the countryside all around the vulture for miles. mine shafts EVERYWHERE!

well old jesse knew of one that was ripe for the pickins. and sure enough when we got there, he was right. about 10 feet down in this caved in shaft was a SPAGHETTI PILE OF RATTLERS!

well after we looked at one another and we all stated there aint no WAY IN HELL we were going down there. jesse jumps down and starts loading up burlap bags full of snakes and handing them up. he was on top of the beams with snake chaps(pants/boots)on.

well after about an hour of this insanity , we load up the beds(plural) of a couple of pick em ups, drank all the beer jesse bought. and headed down the highway back home to offload our spoils at jesses's house.

yep............TWO (2), ZWEI, DOS, FULLSIZE PICK UP BEDS FULL OF WESTERN DIAMOND BACKS IN BURLAP SACKS PISSED OFF TO HIGH HELL!!!!!


NOW THATS NUTS!

i cant drink ENOUGH BEER TO MAKE THESE STORIES UP!

I see some guys having some tongue-in-cheek fun, but no certainly bitterness. A matter of perspective, I guess.

Those guys are having tonque-in-cheek fun. You, by your opening post, are carrying around bitter bags of BS from a post two weeks ago. They've got to be heavy.

Really man, let them go, move on.

Thanks for the diagnosis, Dr. Shaun.

If you honestly believe I carry any "bitterness" or "baggage" from our little b.s. exchanges here in PPOT, you clearly do not know me. It's all in good fun. Maybe I should use more smilies, waveys, and green text. Then those of you that do seem to take this place seriously will better understand that I do not. That I cannot.

Naw, that wouldn't be any fun. Half the fun is watching the hand-wringing ninnies getting their panties all in a twist. Keeping them guessing. Especially the ones that take themselves more seriously than this place warrants.

Lighten up and have some fun, Shaun.

So what exactly IS a hand wringing ninny anyway? Always wondered. Define please. ;)

Anyone I want it to be, god damn it. So there.

Oops... almost forgot:
SmileWavy:):confused::eek::rolleyes::cool::p;):D

Well, I haven't "keeled" any rattlesnakes since that incident in the junkyard east of Orlando, when I had to "evict" a 3 footer from the passenger floor of a '79 928 buried up to its axles in mud....but I've killed PLENTY of iguanas in my back yard in Ft.Lauderdale!

A non-native invasive species, the green iguana has completely overrun south Florida. An average iguana in my neighborhood is about 3 feet long, and is capable of stripping a bush down to sticks in one day. They have voracious appetites, produce poop that is teeming with bacteria [most notably, salmonella], and when they get upwards of 5-6 feet long, they will actually stand their ground when you try to run them off! They hiss, the bob their head, and they bite viciously- they have a mouth full of teeth.

Those teeth? They call these animals "virtually poisonous", due to the fact that their mouth is LOADED with nasty bacteria. If they manage to bite you, you are going to wind up in the emergency room getting stitches, and unless they load you up with antibiotics, then you will get a really nasty infection.

Over the past three years, I have killed upwards of 125 of these things. My technique is to trap them in a large Have-A-Heart trap [made for raccoons] that is baited with banana. Then I either use a Crossman 760 pellet rifle, pumped 15 times, hollow-point hunting pellets, and held directly against their skull to eliminate them, or simply tie a rope to the handle of the trap and toss it into the canal behind my house for an hour.

-These things are TOUGH. That pellet rifle is pretty strong, but even directly to the head, it won't kill the largest iguanas on the first shot! The big nasty ones I have to drown.

I have NO sympathy for these animals. They are escaped/released pets that have bred in the wild, and the ones behind the house are completely feral- you cannot make a pet out of these unless you get them as babies. They are not native to Florida, and have done thousands of dollars worth of damage to my landscaping. ALL of my neighbors have to deal with the damage, yet none of them have taken much action. I have installed metal flashing on the seawall behind my house to keep them out, and though this prevents about 75% of them from reaching my yard, some still come over the neighbors' fence and get into my place. Fort Lauderdale city government, Broward county, and the State of Florida all refuse to take any action on this issue- I even went to the city council of my suburb and asked them to create an ordinance prohibiting the feeding of these lizards. Result:

"We'll look into it" was their answer!

I've had a run-in with one neighbor over the issue of feeding these wild animals, and wound up with the cops at my house. PETA member "Nick" across the canal and his whore-like wife liked to feed the damn things dog food. She even petted them when they came up on their dock! I saw this one day and hopped into my kayak and approached him about it; this wound up in a yelling, screaming fight. In the end, the cops told me to stay away from him, but more importantly they told him not to feed the things.

Is that not common sense or what-? You cannot debate PETA members. They have no concept of logic-

In any case, careful attention on my part and a multi-pronged attack has rendered the problem solved. Occasionally I chase one out of the yard, but all I have to do is put out the trap and invariably I'll kill the interloper within a day or two.

Pets like iguanas have no place in places like Florida- there is no reason to have these, and the people who have owned them in the past are almost invariably irresponsible pet owners. The animals should have been spayed or neutered when they were brought into the state, but they weren't and now I'm buying bananas a couple times each week to deal with the problem. And iguanas are just the start of it down here. Right now, there is a big problem developing in the western suburbs of this town with feral pythons and boa constrictors. Some of these have escaped into the everglades and they have caught these things upwards of 20 feet long!

EVENTUALLY the state or county will do something....probably after a couple of kids get eaten.

N

That's because they're hand-wringing ninnies.

OK! lets me gets this straight here. YOU have an IGUANA PROBLEMO! and YOU want us to FIX IT!

1) they are probably ILLEGAL IGUANAS FROM KUBA. this precludes them from any u.s. citizenship rights accorded by law.

2) they are TERRORIZING the neighborhood and beyond. this makes them TERRORISTS! and precludes them from any rights by the GENEVA CONVENTION.

3) YOUR neighbors are HARBORING FUGITIVES and aiding and abetting FELONS and TERRORISTS!

4) a "WHORELIKE WIFE" is involved .

5) ADD FREE BEER and MOJITO'S AND RWS MESISTERKUGEN PELLETS .177 KALIBER and i will be on the NEXT FLIGHT!

hell THATS A BETTER DEAL THAN THE "FREE BEER" AND LETS COLLECT RATTLESNAKES DEAL OF YESTERYEAR!

i cant think of a BETTER HUNTING TRIP than sitting in a lounge chair with a hawaiian shirt on, sunglasses, my scoped RWS #54, a bucket of pellets, and drinks by my side, binos for the "WHORELIKE WIFE across the street, and BEANING THE HELL OUT OF REPTILIANS WITH A ATTITUDE!

sign me up! can i bring some amigos?????

' charleskieffner '

I hope you have a guest bedroom.
I Googled Earth and got you pinpointed.
I'm coming to spend the summer with you. SmileWavy

I've got the hollow-points and the Corona's ready!

Unfortunately, we can't use the .177's on PETA man's behind, tempting as that is; he's pretty good at calling the cops and even if we hid in the bushes...he'd know exactly what house to send them to-

SmileWavy

N!


http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1245078377.jpg

too funny!

MEIN GOTT IM HIMMEL! CHEESE N' RICE(jesus christ) you freeking LIVE IN JUR-ASS-IC PARK!

i have seen them in pet stores. thats a FREEKING KOMODO DRAGON!

well this is getting to look like the story above when we gazed upon the old mine shaft FULL OF SPAGHETTI(western) RATTLESNAKES! at that moment aside from each of us saying there AINT NO WAY IN HELL WE ARE GOING DOWN THERE!

we may have to have our people talk to yer people about renegotiating the offer!

those bastids are HUGE!


well first thought comes to mind since the PETA PITA people are against our desires to make your area safe for humans, we must be smarter.

SILENT DEATH!

1) compressed air pellet rifle. velocities go thru the roof on some filled with scuba tank. can be suppressed so you only hear action move. mega muzzle velocity with .22 up to .58. YES ! .58!!!!!! look up airguns of arizona or arizona airguns .com in gilbert az. they have the answer. i have my RWS serviced there. spot dead on with 3 x 9 illuminated MIl-DOT scope. i shoot a ton of rock squirrals/rats/snakes with it.

2) BARRETT CROSSBOW! from gander/cabelas/billy bass stores. high velocity. downside: freeking T-REX there may continue movement onto neighbors property and have arrow stuck in him being a dead giveaway. i would fer sure scope it with a 6X FIXED LEUPOLD scope. one shot one kill is our MOTTO!

Ditto.

Charles, I really like my old 1962 vintage Shridan Blue Streak, reworked by MAC1 Airguns as their "steroid" conversion (they sell new ones reworked as well). They install their own proprietary valves, along with a beefed up pump handle to take the extra strain of pumping the darn thing. Mine went from a sub 600 fps rifle at eight pumps to an over 900 fps rifle with 14 pumps. That's with that solid front, 14.5 grain Sheridan pellet. Superior sectional density and penetration over any .22 caliber pellet. It will shoot clear through the largest of suburban back yard pests found up here in our neck of the woods. Damn accurate, too - it will stay on a dime as far away as you can still see one.

http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1245084527.jpg

Grandma's back at it again after a long hospital stay.

Any cooking tips for racoon?

http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1245097499.jpg

Any pics of the "whore-like" wife?

.22 pellets are wayy better than .177 for knock down power. same as 9mm and .45. they both kill, but the .22 pellet puts them down fast with that weight of pellet. a .177 rws #54 velocity( i think its 1100fps) makes it deadly on larger critters at closer ranges which sometimes is hard to do, depending on where yer at on your property. i have a 30 ft fire swath cut around property so its difficult to sneak up undetected. maybe i should cut my screens out on my windows? YUCK YUCK!

one of my better shots the other day was this damn rock squirral who has been terrorizing my fiance's plants and freshly planted trees. she is kind of squemish at hunting but this clown finally got her goat, and the "GREEN" light was given to TERMINATE W/EXTREME PREDJUDICE!. i had no problems since i had been after his ass for at least 2 months, because he was climbing into vehicle engine compartments and that is just plain unacceptable behavior.

every damn time i would spy his destructive ass, by the time i got into my sniper hides(many), he would either hear me or the dog, see me, or just split. this got me pissed. i ended up sneaking up on him numerous times barefoot over granite rock in my yard. by the time i would get into position..........he was gone.

this guy gave me fits. anyway we have been feeding/watering the entire upper sonoran dezert bird population with feeders and a daily filled watering hole. well this lil bastid was climbing the palo verde tree and knocking the feeders down while we were away. this was just plain dastardly and unexcusable.

well i walked up to kitchen window the other morning checking out the bird action and guess whos there filling his cheeks????? osama bin squirral!

grabbed the RWS, grabbed some pellets, loaded same, cocked same, snuck out bedroom door barefoot, had fiance grab dog. got up to fence, but fence too high. went to gate and at an angle on my tip toes got sight picture, flipped safety off, held sight picture, exhaled.......................AND BLAMMO ! (1) dead as hell osama bin rock squirral. total distance about 25 yds.

moral to story:

1) DONT EVER CLIMB IN MY ENGINE COMPARTMENTS........EVER! unless invited and ya got beer!

2) DONT EVER FEEEK WITH FIANCES FLOWERS/PLANTS/TREES

3) DONT EVER STEAL BIRD FEED FROM BIRDS!

4) IF YER GONNA BE A "SQUIRRAL" ya better mind yer damn manners!

Check the ballistics on that 5mm (.20 caliber) pellet, Charles. All the weight of the .22 but better sectional density. The new style Sheridan 5mm pellet (since first the Benjamin, and then the Crossman take over) is vastly improved over the first generation. One of the highest ballistic coefficeint air rifle pellet available today.

One of these days, when I feel like spending some money on a pellet rifle, I'm looking at one of the Beeman RX-2's in .20 caliber. All of the power of my reworked Sheridan, but in a spring piston package. 14 pumps gets a little tireing after awhile...

Something has been digging up the wife's new flower starts in her garden. She is upset. She has assigned myself and the boys to extermination duties. Of course to her, that means get yer ass to the store and get some poison and traps. To us, that means get our asses to the store and get some beer and pellets...