Australia. What have you heard?

coolngroovy · 10-07-2009, 03:07 PM

G'day all,
I'm curious to hear some of the myths & bull**** that are going around the world about Australia.
Stuff like .....kangaroo's hopping down the main street of Sydney ect. [btw...that's not true]
I thought it may be interesting, & if not, good for a giggle atleast.
Please share.

Cheers, Col.

peppy · 10-07-2009, 03:12 PM

water swirls to the left when going down a drain

BeyGon · 03:14 PM

I hear your laws on drinking and driving are pretty severe and the same with speeding and cameras. Plus I hear you still drive on the wrong side of the highway, What's with that? I hear you have funnel webs and really bad snakes. When I was in Sydney I saw lots of good looking women.

coolngroovy · 10-07-2009, 03:14 PM

Quote:

hear your laws on drinking and driving are pretty severe and the same with speeding and cameras. Plus I hear you still drive on the wrong side of the highway, What's with that?

I think it has something to do with WW2.......& tackling the Yanks head on! [no offence intended]

tabs · 10-07-2009, 03:17 PM

I hear that a favorite food of ya all from down under is Brown Eyed Mullet...

Oh Haha · 10-07-2009, 03:21 PM

Ya'll have some funny sounding city names.

EVERYONE says "g'day mate".

IROC · IROC's Garage

Your "paper" money is actually plastic.

holtjv · 10-07-2009, 03:38 PM

"Pleasantville".

Which, btw, I found to be nearly true when I last visited.

sammyg2 · 10-07-2009, 03:43 PM

This is all I've heard (Bart vs. Australia) :

Bruno: Ooh! Ah, that's it. I'm going to report this to me member of
parliament. [yells out window] Hey, Gus! I got something to
report to you.
[Gus tends his swine]
Gus: That's a bloody outrage, it is! I want to take this all the way
to the Prime Minister.
[they go down to a lake]
Hey! Mr. Prime Minister! Andy!
Andy: [floating naked on an inner tube with a beer] Eh, mates! What's
the good word?

Unfortunately, Bart, your little escapade could not have come
at a worse time. [sets up screen] Americo-Australianian
relations are at an all-time low.
[talks over a slide show]
As I'm sure you remember, in the late 1980s the US experienced
a short-lived infatuation with Australian culture. For some
bizarre reason, the Aussies thought this would be a permanent
thing. Of course, it wasn't.

Marge: "Australia was originally founded as a settlement for British
convicts"! Oh, Lisa, watch your camera.
[Lisa turns around to see a group of people reaching for it;
they back off sheepishly and turn to another tourist]

[Bart flicks a pocket knife open and closed repeatedly]
Man: You call that a knife? _This_ is a knife.
Bart: That's not a knife, that's a spoon.
Man: All right, all right, you win, heh. I see you've played
Knifey-Spooney before.
Homer: [to bartender] Hey! Give me one of those famous giant beers
I've heard so much about.
[bartender puts a huge beer in front of him]
Bartender: Something wrong, yank?
Homer: No. It's pretty big...I guess.
Marge: I'll just have a cup of coffee.
Bartender: Beer, it is.
Marge: No, I said "coffee".
Bartender: "Beer"?
Marge: [slowly] Coff-ee.
Bartender: Be-er?
Marge: C -- O --
Bartender: B -- E --

"Now, boy! Run back to the embassy, back to American soil" yells Homer,
smashing the window with the boot and running out.
Man 1: I'll stop them!
[throws a boomerang which skims Bart's hair]
Oh, no! It's coming back this way!
Man 2: That throwing stick stunt of yours has boomeranged on us.
Bart: [spying a kangaroo] Hey! We can get away in their pouches.
[tries to climb in]
Ew! It's not like in cartoons.
Homer: Yeah, there's a lot more mucus.
-- Mmm, pouch mucus,

Owner: [sweeping a bunch of toads out] Get out, get out! Shoo, shoo.
Get out of here, yuck! These bloody things are everywhere.
They're in the lift, in the lorry, in the bond wizard, and all
over the malonga gilderchuck.
Clerk: They're like kangaroos, but they're reptiles, they is.
Marge: We have them in America. They're called bullfrogs.
Clerk: What? That's an odd name. I'd have called them "chazzwazzers".

Looking_for_911 · 10-07-2009, 03:44 PM

What I know to be true is that a distant cousin of mine went Down Under for a vacation, or "Holiday," several years ago and loved it. He met a girl while there, they began a romance, he came back to the states after another trip and told the family he was engaged, was moving down Under to marry her and has never considered the thought of moving back to the US.
He told us that in the town where they live a few years back (can't remember the name at the moment) they had a purse snatching. The whole town was in an uproar and the police issued an APB for the suspect, a police sketch of the guy was all over the television news, the papers called for justice because of the "crime wave" - they hadn't had anything like that in years - and in short order the guy was caught and tried and prosecuted!
He and his "Sheila" are still there, blissfully happy, and we never expect to see them live here!

coolngroovy · 10-07-2009, 04:14 PM

hahahaha..........i fell off my chair!

Quote:

I hear that a favorite food of ya all from down under is Brown Eyed Mullet

I've never heard of a 'brown eyed mullet'. I think you might be confusing that with the highly prized 'deep sea racing mullet'.

Quote:

EVERYONE says "g'day mate".

Why yes......yes we do! Paul Hogan didn't invent that!

Quote:

Your "paper" money is actually plastic.

Yep......the plastic stuff is harder to photocopy.

Quote:

"Pleasantville".

Now that is scarey! I live in a place called Mt Pleasant.

Sammyg........have you comitted that to memory?.....or are you reading from Q cards?
That's quite scarey also! I enjoyed that episode..........the first 5 times. We have Simpsons repeats 5 days/week.

Quote:

He told us that in the town where they live a few years back (can't remember the name at the moment) they had a purse snatching. The whole town was in an uproar and the police issued an APB for the suspect

That sounds like any small town in the country. [or should that be continent?]
The police try to act quickly on these matters. If they dont, the locals usually find out who the perpetrator is, they are tied to a tree in the middle of a paddock, & the Drop Bears do the rest. Not a pretty sight.

Oh Haha · 10-07-2009, 04:18 PM

Your signature location says "Whitsundays". Is that Australian for Mt. Pleasant?

And just what is a Drop Bear?

Bill Douglas · 10-07-2009, 04:26 PM

Bruce-o got an old billy goat from the maket.

Wayne-o asked him where he was going to keep it.

Bruce-o said in the house.

Wayne-o said what about the stink (billy goats are male and STINK)?

Bruce-o said well, he's gunna have to get used to it, isn't he.

coolngroovy · 04:28 PM

Quote:

And just what is a Drop Bear?

You dont know?
A Drop Bear is a carnivouris breed of Koala. But they have much longer claws & teeth.
They live in trees & wait for their prey to walk past, then drop down & start clawing like a madman. They also hunt in packs, only at night though.
We dont see too many of them anymore. Mainly just in dense scrub regions. I think they might be on the extinction list. Feral little critters!

BeyGon · 10-07-2009, 05:13 PM

are they a cousin of the "snipe"?

Looking_for_911 · 10-07-2009, 05:18 PM

Maybe it's because of the Drop Bears or maybe because Australia ain't slap-eat up with people that think criminals should be dealt with lightly. Whatever the reason, he said they never lock their cars or windows of their house and never fear for their safety when out and about.
Kind of like America in the old days... or at least the America I grew up in. We had Drop Bears, too... they were called Police and they were honorable men that did their job without taking kickbacks and the justice system had yet to allow criminals to run this country....
Ok, dangerously close to PARF... I better go check on the ribs!

coolngroovy · 10-07-2009, 05:47 PM

I think there is some more info on them there.

Bill Douglas · 10-07-2009, 08:10 PM

Anyway... Back on topic. I've heard Whitsundays are nice, and the pics look nice. I haven't been north of Nossa, but I like it around there and Malulaba (sp). Mind you, Byron Bay is probably my most favorite place in the world.

Dottore · 10-07-2009, 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bill Douglas

Mind you, Byron Bay is probably my most favorite place in the world.

We were there once, and I understand why you might say this.

A magic place.

AFC-911 · 10-07-2009, 08:34 PM

I hear that rooting means something completely different over there & that when Australians come to Canada, they buy all sorts of stuff from the company "Roots" because you guys find it funny that the word is on all sorts of apparel.

*This was explained to me by a Canadian friend while at a Roots store in Quebec, so I have no idea if it's accurate.

PS - If it's true, I'd like to root an Australian's hot sister.