|
My $0.02: Best thing in the world. Your life will be totally different and changed (some for good and some for bad), but my kids are the most fun thing in the world, IMO. But I also realize that it's not for everyone. Unfortunately there are some parents who don't realize the same thing, or realize it too late.
|
We're both 36, I don't particularly want any, she's not so sure, but we've decided (at least I think we have...) that we are at the age when we will not so it. It would be 2 years of prepping and changing our lives, jobs and health before we could consider it, and neither of us will have a kid at age 38. Too risky for the kid.
Now, if my brother would just get on with having kids himself, then I'd be a fin, upstanding uncle. |
This is a question that only you can answer. Me? I wasn't so sure. My wife? No kids? No wife! She made it clear, that we WOULD have children. I considered the options and now we have three.
Regrets? Nope. They are fantastic. Truely the reason that I get up in the morning and go to work. Loud? Yes. Obnoxious? Yes. Do I love them with every fiber of my body? Yes. Do I yell at them? Yes. I personally think most babies are ugly and don't care much for most other peoples kids. In fact, my wife's best friends kids particularly bug me. My kids? Fabulous. The question that I like to ask is "what will your life look like should you live to your 80's" Will your actions have enhanced your travel or made you a bitter old person? Children or not, you need to live with your decisions. Both are fine. Good luck. Larry |
I just LOVE it when some grumpy old ASS that openly admits disliking kids thumps their chest and says "This is how you do it. And your kids suck!" Then goes on to add the "world is screwed because of your kids".
You can't pay for that kind of insight. Gold, I tell you. Just sayin' |
Will, I think I was the the same way - I wouldn't call that reluctant. I was willing to do it but apprehensive since I did not know what 'it' really was.
I had my first at 31 and I too am irritated that I didn't start earlier and have more. I have 2 boys now and they are the best things that have ever happened to me next to my wife. They are endlessly frustrating but I wouldn't change anything. |
Quote:
Just about to turn 40, already raised a child from another relationship (she is 18) and just got married last May... Like your situation, I knew my wife wanted a family and that most likely included us having a child together.... I would have been fine without another child. however, as I love my wife and in a healthy way put "us" above "me", together we are stronger then apart, and she waited a long time to get married, has a good paying professional career, her priorities are straight, is financially stable, and most importantly I know she'll be a great mother... So, after a our wedding we started to "try". She thought being 40 it would take a while...well it didn't, my swimmers are Olympic quality :D Now we are in our 4th month of pregnancy and there nerves are creeping into my head... But having been through this before I just remind myself; I knew what I was getting into, I married an amazing woman, we are blessed to be stable in this economy etc. I basically tell myself to be strong and remember who I'm fighting for when the anxiety comes, she is counting on me. It will all work out, keeping a positive mental attitude is paramount to keeping our family headed in the best direction for us. It's natural to have anxiety when expecting such a big change, but with a strong and healthy marriage, together we will succeed. I expect you will too. Stay focused, allow yourself "moments", but don't dwell on them. Look at your beautiful wife and remember you are both in this together, she is counting on you and your strength through this life changing event it can be a blessing if you allow it to be. Remember the glue that will keep it together is the love and forgiveness you have for each other. I also found talking openly with her on the subject helped a lot. I discovered I wasn't the only one who had reservations. Sorry for being long winded http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1255631958.jpg |
Quote:
That is one awesome photo. I wanna have kids so I have competition to kart against. |
Quote:
|
Whatever happened to "HebrewHomeBoy"?
|
Too busy changing diapers to post.
|
Have two.......you can race them!
|
Best thing that ever happened in my life. Changes you as a person, almost certainly for the better. Challenging and at times exhausting? Sure. But a tremendous source of joy, laughter and love.
http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1255669425.jpg |
Quote:
I am mixed whether or not I will have kids when I settle down. It will be a while though... I love kids always have.... Problem is I am not sure I want to bring another life into such an unstable world.... |
Married in '05, but we wanted to wait until we had a kid... wanted everything to be PERFECT. My wife went back to school and got a new job. We paid down debt. Did work on the house. I got a promotion and a raise. We were ready! When she was pregnant last fall, we had everything all planned out... I was even approved at work to take 4months of parental leave.
And then I got laid off in February. Took the real estate course, got licensed 2 days before my daughter was born. Working 70+ hours a week to make a "go" of it while feeding and changing diapers all through the night. I get traction and start selling houses, and start getting commissions "banked" for the winter Then the real estate company I work for folds, I lose the commissions and have to start from scratch in August. So, I start working 80+hrs a week to make up for the losses. Meanwhile my daughter is starting on solid foods, laughs every time I come in the room, and all she knows is that she is loved and lives in a happy home. It's been a crazy 6 months. It's been tough as hell, actually. But ask me if I'd change anything... http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1255698870.jpg |
There was a thread recently about high school reunions - and I said something about how many of my peers grew up to be "better people". Most of that, I think is because most of them are parents.
|
Wow, Jake, is she ever cute! I had that exact same bowl when I was his age :)
|
Quote:
|
Few years ago, I had similar feeling when I got married. Then similar feeling about having baby. I am not the type who want to be single all my life but always feel not ready before I hit it, but I am ok now. Actually, happy. You'll be ok. Hey, think about your boy sits on your driver's seat, holds your steering wheel, and asks you to teach him to drive when he grow up ;)
|
The only thing I am reluctant about is when he waxes me on video games.
Baby making sex is the best - you have that whole new level of danger, importance, joy and fear all rolled into one. |
Quote:
|
Quote:
well....without getting too graphic there is also first few weeks post birth sex where the doc says to give the ol' happy place a break. slick willy wouldn't call it sex....but by my definition it most certainly is! |
Reluctant father? Mine. Because I see him in so many of my ways, I will never have kids.
|
Well, I am staring over the edge of the slippery slope. My wife is pregnant and the due date is August 28th. No one has mentioned any type of return policy if this doesn't work out...
|
You are off to an adventure...
|
Quote:
Willtel, the journey will soon not be about you. Saddle up, enjoy the ride. It is over far faster than you can imagine. |
What Paul and Paul said!
|
a toast to all you dads & soon to be muttering too self fathers...
Rika |
Quote:
Congratulations to you and your wife! |
Quote:
OP, I didn' have them until I was in my late 30s. They are my little buddies. My older boy (5 now) and I build things together. We even visit my construction job sites together sometimes. When you have your kid, hold them whenever you can. When they turn 3, it happens real fast, they don't want you to hold them any longer. They want to go and play. Holding them now takes a little effort to catch them. It takes even effort to get them to stay put so you can rap your arms around them just like when there were small. You will be fine. Jeff |
Hold on a second I may change my mind. I took my 4yo to have new ear molds for his hearing aids and he lost it. There was nothing I could do he just screamed and cried like we were killing him. I had to hold him down ( that little turd can squirm).
|
Quote:
Karl 88 Targa |
Quote:
|
I don't know if reluctant describes how I felt but certainly scared crapless...and also you naturally question your suitability for the job ahead.
We were married around 12 years before having our first child - he is now 9. While there are of course stressful and frustrating moments along with way, no question it has been a blessing and one of the greatest things in my life. About 1.5 years ago we adopted our daughter and she is a real smile-generator as well. |
From the length of time from the original post to now, it looks like you at least got to poke some fun at her for a while....
Congrats! I was 44 when my little guy was born. I wouldn't trade it for anything... Well maybe a 959.... No, no no. I wouldn't trade it for anything. One funny thing he said to me when I asked him what was going to happen if he kept doing something I asked him not to. He said "there is going to be trouble". I laughed so hard, I had tears streaming down my face! (he is three now) |
Do it. Early and often. Anyone with the intelligence to participate on a Porsche forum will only raise the average with their offspring.
For you soulless child-hating monsters, please feel free to continue to NOT procreate. That's a win-win situation for everyone. http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1302383184.jpg |
Kids in general are not that great.....YOUR kids, on the other hand, are simply the greatest experience you can ever have on this planet. Easy? No, but worth every minute.
I was 37 when I had my first, and like StomachMonkey, I wish I would have done it sooner. JA |
We had out 1st child when my wife and I were both 29. she was ready for the family thing earlier than I was but after I came back from Desert Storm, we decided it was time. Now, our son is 19 and our daughter is 15. The days go by slowly, but the years fly by!! I'm thankful we have our kids!!
|
Whatever fears and uncertianity you have right now, will be erased from your head the first time you lay eyes on your newborn child. I was blown away, and I felt my life change instantly at that moment. I have lived a good life, and chased most of me dreams, but none of them compare to the feeling of being a father. He is my best little buddy, and the most important thing in my life. You'll see. I no longer wonder what I am doing here, it has become very clear.
|
Quote:
Now there are grandchildren and it just gets better. A confession: In 1985 he asked to take his date to their prom in my Speedster. The lights weren't working and I was busy blah blah and I said no. To this day that is one of my biggest regrets. If I had it to do over i would have worked night and day so my son could take his date to the prom in my Porsche Speedster. Like I said, it's a roller coaster. |
My wife was pregnant when this thread was started, and my daughter is now almost a year old. All I can say is wow. I feel like I squandered a lot of the spare time I had before. That being said, I don't regret the change one bit.
|
| All times are GMT -8. The time now is 10:41 PM. |
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0
Copyright 2025 Pelican Parts, LLC - Posts may be archived for display on the Pelican Parts Website