bag of frozen peas!!

There are billboards all over Houston

I see that going something like this.

Uh, thanks, but rather than a money back guarantee, I'd just rather you just didn't screw anything up down there. "Mr Smith, while we were reversing your vasectomy we nicked a nerve. You wouldn't shoot blanks if your junk still worked, but it doesn't, so here's your money back."

Nope, no interest in that.

Frozen peas are your friend! Mine was'nt bad, pain only lasted about 3 days.

Mine was terrible. Doc cut before the anesthesia took effect, smoke rising from down there and hit something else with the electric cauterizer. Was very glad when that was over.

Nice, so the Docs want to brand your sack while they're down there. A sharp knife is bad enough, but a hot poker too? Hell no. ;)

Actually , the worst part was the initial needle in the sack. I almost ripped the arm off the chair!

Bet I've got you both beat on vasectomy horror stories. My first marriage was to a model a few years older than me. We were blissfully in love...ahhhhh, youthful passion. She had a history of ectopic pregnancies. Also had problems with oral contraceptives. We were both wrapped up in our careers and were positive we never wanted children. Sooooo, at the wise old age of 24, in an effort to assure a spontaneous sex life "we" decided I would have a vasectomy.

The surgery was relatively uneventful although for some reason to this very day I'm aroused by ice packs. However, one week post-op I return home a day early from a business trip. Find her in bed with one of my best friends. So much for her commitment and my chivalry.

Long story short, marriage ends, she lives with the former friend for the next 20 years. A few years ago they broke up, she and I had a re-union tryst, wherein she wanted to rekindle, I thought not, yadadada...I've written about this elsewhere in OT.

At times I have regretted my decision at such a young age as I really do like kids and many people think I would have been a great dad. At others it has come in handy, most particularly when I was sued in a paternity case in my 30's.

towell clamps...(small evil Lobster hands)
'your may feel a little sting...'
zzzzt..followed by smoke...
peas..
and did you know..
.testing your 'pipes' to early will confirm..
your scrotum can hold mellons...

ah the things we do for love/cratch..

Rika

I'm putting this one on notice for post of the year

Just do not move on day 1 & 2. Does not matter if you feel great or not, stay on the couch! My brother felt great on day 2 and started moving around like life was normal.

Woke up on day 3 with grapefruit sized things between his legs...

lol... nonchalance quote of the year

its a matter of perspective. i work in health care and see the suffering the folks i work with are subjected to. what happened to me, even with a years worth of chemotherapy, is a drop in the bucket.

as for the peas, that was the advice of everyone at the office. its all good. two days out and i feel pretty much ok, just a little sore when i walk.

hematoma. i bet that hurt like a *****. that was how i finally was forced to go to the doctor for my cancer: a hematoma the size of a grapefruit, literally, between my legs. that was pretty uncomfortable, for sure.

seriously?

scheduled for 12/22.

they say 6 weeks to get the stragglers out but i have been fully intending to set a new record on that.

perhaps not?

very serious...
did a rotation at Tripler AMC vas. clinic
after having ones jewel's modified..
you and most folks want to make sure it still works..
it does..
so NO...I mean NO testing..
kick back..catch a buzz...peas..
I know what I saw..
and I've seen big boys cry..
big mellons, scrotal sack almost clear

as for stragglers...yep...
somebody use something..
cause it's not over till the tech gives you the all clear..

it's a piece of cake..

follow the instructions..

Rika

Vasectomy

Two men are in the doctor's office waiting to get vasectomies.

A nurse comes in and asks the men to strip and put on their medical Gowns while they wait for the doctor.
A few minutes later she comes back, reaches under one man's gown and begins to masturbate him.


Shocked, he says, "What the hell are you doing?" To which she replies,

"We have to vacate the sperm from your system to have a clean Procedure."

Not wanting to cause a problem, the man relaxes and enjoys it as she Completes her task.

The second man watches all of this and by the time the nurse turns to Him, he is quite ready for his turn.
To his surprise, she drops to her knees, opens her lips and begins to Give him a blowjob.

The first man says, "Hey, what is this? Why is it that I get a hand Job and he gets blow job?"

The nurse says, "That, my dear sir, is the difference between Government run Obama-care and private health insurance. :D