You only get One........
 

Most of the time when I’ve had a long day a work I take a look at Pelican OT to see what’s the latest in the world of PPOT and very rarely am I let down….someone else has been put on Z-Man’s 2-week vacation plan, someone is talking about the girl(s) of their dream, someone has been able to put their marriage back together (which lately has been a huge help personally), and/or to hear someone’s philosophical personal point of view which causes me to stop and think for a moment. Today I wanted to share my own personal point of view on something that is going to bother me for a long time because I thought about it, but didn’t act out on something as simple as a phone call.

This morning I went over to my Mom’s house to do a few choirs and to visit with her, but I knew something wasn’t right when she didn’t meet me at the door. I found my Mom in her bedroom and sometime early this morning she had passed away. Without going into all of the challenges she had experienced over the past 20 months, the three greatest that she faced was being diagnosed with diabetes back in early 09, congestive heart issues related to the diabetes (leading to her receiving a pace-maker in March), and breast cancer this past January, not to mention me having to move her from our family home of 35 years (which needed major renovation) to a smaller home. Since I’m the oldest of three, 99% of the responsibility (both houses and the balance of the financials) had been placed on my shoulders so lately when Mom called for help around the house, I tried to be there to take care of her needs, but sometimes I fell short.

This weekend will bother me the rest of my life because I thought about calling her to check-in and she how her 4th of July was, but I procrastinated and told myself that it could wait until today…..well today is too late. So I’d like to remind you that you only get one…….one Mom and one Dad. Treasure your time with them and NEVER miss an opportunity to call and tell them that you love them.

On a very positive note, I was promoted to Lieutenant Colonel last month there was nobody more proud of me than my Mom……..here is a photo of us shortly after she “pinned” me.

I Love You Mom.


http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploa...1278467128.jpg

edit - sorry, i need reading comprehension lessons...

congrats on the promotion. sorry about your loss - god speed

Deepest condolences, Mike.

Great read. Sorry to hear about her passing, but it was her time. She was there for you and you were there for her, over the last few years. I'm dealing with the same thing on my wife's side with her dad. Her Mom is just stressed out from caring for him in their own place. My wife is the closest and most helpful of all the siblings, so it will come pretty hard when they pass away. Again, sorry for your loss, but that is one great picture.

Deepest condolences on your loss and congratulations on your promotion. I am going through a very similar time with my Dad at the moment. He was diagnosed with ALS 2 years ago and it is progressing very quickly.


Chris

I spent a few hours with my mom on the 4th. After reading this, i'm glad i did.

Sorry to hear of your loss, but congrats on your silver oakleafs.

My condolences Mike. I probably wouldn't have been as clear headed to write such a beautifully written summery. When it is time to leave, it is time.
I think the quality of life is expotentially more important than the quantity, and it sounds like she lived life to the fullest. That is something which should never be taken away.

sorry for your families loss,
please carry on with all the good that your mother has given to you,
just that fact that you missed out and it bothers you says volumes about your character

My condolences Mike. Please don't beat yourself over the above. Your mom lives on in your memories, so think about how she would dismiss your feelings of guilt (which is perfectly natural imo). You made her very proud...it's obvious in that beautiful picture. Be well...

My sincerest condolences to you and your family.

People. It is what the world is about. Cherish them. Love them. Take care of them.

Mission accomplished Mike.

Mike, my condolences.

Thanks for sharing your story of a beautiful woman.

Mike, my condolances. All of us who have lost parents wish for that one more time conversation. The pic of your promotion sez it all...your mom loved you...
Hang on to that.

Mike, it sounds like you loved your mom, and she shared the same love for you. By writing this post it shows the composure that I hope I can have during a difficult situation like the one you are faced with. We are here for you if ya need someone to talk to.

condolences on your loss, I can't even imagine...

Mike, I am sorry to hear of your loss.
I don't know how you feel, but I lost my dad 5 months ago and it still hurts, but it is getting better.

Mike - I can relate. Seems like we always want to say or do that one last thing before...well before we never see that person again. Many of us make it a habit to make sure we tell those we love that we love them as often as we can. Seems like we don't want regrets for not letting that person know how we felt.

I think they know. Sorry for your loss. Prayers made

Sorry for your loss, Mike. I never decline a visit from my Mom or to drive to see her.

She can be frustrating for us at times but I figure I was kind of a handful when growing up so I owe her.

Take care.

Sounds to me like you were a good son and your mother was very proud of you. You never make all the right calls and can't be there all the time. Don't beat yourself up for that. Condolences on the death of your mother.

I had to give a eulogy on July 5th for a very good friend. He had been a CW4 helo pilot in the Army for 26 years, spent three tours in Vietnam (medivac) and recently spent 8 months in the hospital trying to recover from a brain abscess, most of that time in ICU. In the end it came down to a decision for his brother. I will miss my friend but I know now he is in a better place. July 4th will never be the same for either of us.

I'm certain your mother is in a better place as well and she is proud she had such a good son.

Everything Mom

How did you find the energy, Mom
To do all the things you did,
To be teacher, nurse and counselor
To me, when I was a kid.

How did you do it all, Mom,
Be a chauffeur, cook and friend,
Yet find time to be a playmate,
I just can’t comprehend.

I see now it was love, Mom
That made you come whenever I'd call,
Your inexhaustible love, Mom
And I thank you for it all.

By Joanna Fuchs

Mission accomplished indeed.

Sorry for your loss, she looked really proud of you in that picture.

So sorry to hear of this loss Mike. It is every parent's dream that their children "turn out good"...You can tell in that picture the love both of you had for each other.

Know exactly how you feel, what you describe is almost exactly the same thing that happened with my Father.

Sorry for your loss....

I'm sorry for your loss Mike, she must have been very proud of you, mom's live for your achievements, so I'm sure you were with her more than you might think.

It's always better to be making memories with your parents than to just have memories of them.

sorry for the loss. :(

Mike, we share some things......

I'm taking care of my mom during her last days.
We both serve.

Good on all accounts to you. You cherished your mom and 'nuff said.

Do U feel guility that if you had called it might have made a difference? Or do U feel that U would like to have said I love you one last time? Or Both?

I personally feel U did the best U could. She knew you loved her...that you cared for her. There is one he11 of a hole where she once stood...in your whole life she was always in your life..and now she is gone. U may think I will give her a call and talk to her, only to realize you can't. At those moments you would like to grab it back, only to realize your only grabbing at air. The first year is the toughest, because you will be thinking only last month....only last Christmas...after the first year the hole starts to fill in as life goes on. Give yourself the time, you will know when to get up off the chair, cause you won't want to be sitting there anymore.

May God richly bless and comfort you.

So very sorry for your loss.


May God Bless
Karl

I've killed half of the earth population..
puppies and kittens fear my name...
I'm planning something for that other half...

and my Mom would proclaim...
he's a good man...

as your Mom surely did often..!
you can see how proud she was..

Rika

Mike, I am so sorry to hear of you loss. My deepest condolences go out to you and your family.

Michael

It hits hard. Sorry for your loss AND that is a GREAT photo of you and your mom.

Just saw this Mike, sorry for your loss, but it sounds like your mom lived her life to the fullest, and you've got to admire that. I know that doesn't help, but you shoiuld celebrate her life.

My condolences, Mike...she was a beautiful lady. I'm sure even more so on the inside.

She passed away quickly, in her sleep. That is a blessing, it may not feel like it now, but it is.

I watched my father in law die of cancer, in his home, wasted away and in great pain. You wouldn't have wanted that.

Her last dreams were probably of you and of how proud she was.

My condolences as well. You did absolutely nothing wrong calling on one day and not the other. You were a good son, you made her life worth living. People live for their kids, especially when they turn out good like you.

Please continue your habit of checking-in here often...

Thanks for posting such a thoughtful message. I will call my mom today.

Godspeed on the healing process.

Thank you for all of your thoughts and prayers. When we met with the minister yesterday, I was reminded of all of the great things that Mom did throughout her life and how many lives were touched by her. As a hairdresser in a "small town" like Huntsville, she always knew when someone needed help and she was the first person there to help with whatever needed to be done. If you knew my mom, you never would be hungry because she was ALWAYS cooking for someone that wasn't able to care for themselves. She was a close friend to the majority of her clients and whenever a client passed away, she would insist of taking care of their hair "pro bono".

I was also reminded of what she gave of herself as a single parent raising three children. I was going through some of her files last night and I found a receipt for a Raleigh Record bike that she bought for me back in back in 74 (she didn't throw away ANYTHING) and it reminded me of how much she sacrificed for me and my siblings. A hairdresser back in the 70's didn't make a too much money but she did manage to raise us in a great neighborhood with greats schools....although we didn't have a lot of "nice" things, we did have a great mother who loved and cared for her children more than anything.

I ask that you continue to pray for the family but also for me.....I'm trying to gather the courage to speak about Mom during her memorial service tomorrow and I'm praying for the strength to make it through without falling apart.

There's nothing wrong with falling apart once in a while.

Mike,

Will do and while I can tell you that it does get easier with time, it takes a long time before the tears end.

I had part of the job of going through my Mothers effects, and all of my Fathers things. It brings back a lot of memories, most good and some not so good. Take care of the things and move along. Share her effects with the whole family so that they have something to remember her by.

Enjoy the good times you had with her and do what she would want you all to do, and be as much like her as you can.

Joe A