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Two all beef patties

TWO ALL BEEF PATTIES, SPECIAL SAUCE, LETTUCE, CHEESE, PICKLES, ONIONS, ON A SASAME SEED BUN.
Two all beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese pickles onions on a sesame seed bun
Twoallbeefpattiesspecialsaucelettucecheesepickleso nionsonasesameseedbun
2’lbifpatsspshlsssletuscheezpclzonyzonasezmzzdbun

Yep, I'm old.

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Old 12-14-2010, 07:20 AM
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canna change law physics
 
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For some reason I said that at a McDonalds about 30 years ago and they asked if I wanted to be timed...I said it in under 2 seconds so they gave me free fries. No promotion.
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The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the engineer adjusts the sails.- William Arthur Ward (1921-1994)
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Old 12-14-2010, 07:28 AM
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canna change law physics
 
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McDonalds is your kind of place

Hamburgers in your face

French Fries between your toes

Hot pie, up your nose

And don't forget those frosty shakes

Straight from , polluted lakes

McDonalds is-your-kind-of-place...
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The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the engineer adjusts the sails.- William Arthur Ward (1921-1994)
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Last edited by red-beard; 12-14-2010 at 09:19 AM..
Old 12-14-2010, 07:29 AM
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red, i raise my glass in a toast to you for loosening a very dusty memory. what a song.
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Old 12-14-2010, 07:53 AM
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Old 12-14-2010, 08:59 AM
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Quote:
Hold the pickle, hold the lettuce,

Special orders won't upset us...

All we ask is to have it your way!!!
OR, the better version :

Quote:
Drop the pickle, drop the lettuce,

Shut up lady, don't upset us.

All we ask it to ... throw it away!
-Z-man.
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Old 12-14-2010, 09:03 AM
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canna change law physics
 
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I had a Dutch guy complain to me, while I was working in Romania, that we Americans expected too much. This whole Burger King thing was wrong. You take it the way we give it to you, and you like it. OK?!?
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The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the engineer adjusts the sails.- William Arthur Ward (1921-1994)
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Old 12-14-2010, 09:21 AM
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I used to tell a joke about two obese Pattys, special Ross, Lattus picking bunions on a sesame street bus. A long time ago.

Prolly not PC anymore.
Old 12-14-2010, 10:25 AM
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Old 12-14-2010, 12:05 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by red-beard View Post
... You take it the way we give it to you, and you like it. OK?!?
sounds like a French chef
Old 12-14-2010, 12:08 PM
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Formerly reformed
 
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Dey turk er jerbs!
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Old 12-14-2010, 12:10 PM
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"It takes two hands,
to handle a Whoper!
The two-fisted burger
from Burger King!"

or....the alternative versions from when I was 6 yrs. old...

"It takes two hands,
to handle a teacher!
A three-headed creature
from outer-space!"

Randy
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Old 12-14-2010, 12:21 PM
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One version:

Quote:
A man took a new job as a bus driver and was given a bus with a Sesame Street advertisement on the side. At his first stop he picked up two fat Irish women who’s names both happened to be Pattie. At his next stop he picked up a man named Ross. This man felt highly of himself and insisted that everyone call him Special Ross. At the next stop was a biker who didn’t have a name, but he said he usually goes by his nickname, Lester T.

During the ride, Lester T sat in the back picking at his feet while the others looked at him with disgust.

When the bus driver finished his route, he was asked how his day was by one of his co-workers.

“It reminded me of McDonalds” said the bus driver. Two obese Patties, Special Ross, Lester T pickin’ his bunyons on a Sesame Street bus.
Another version:
Quote:
Sesame Street Bus Driver


Have you heard about the man who got the job driving the bus for Sesame Street? He was really looking forward to meeting all the Sesame St. characters, and so he was filled with great anticipation his first day on the job. As he stood outside the bus waiting for his riders to begin to arrive, the first person he saw approaching the bus was an *extremely* large woman. Before she boarded the bus, he asked her her name. Huffing and puffing from the exertion of walking, she replied, "My name is Patty." "Well, Patty, climb on board. We'll be leaving shortly." The next passenger, a man just as big as the woman, was wearing a large green suit. When asked his name by the new driver, he replied with a noticeable accent, "My name is Patrick...I'm Irish, you know. My friends all call me 'Patty'." "Patty, meet Patty. You two can get to know each other while I await several more passengers that I see coming."

As the new driver stood there, he found himself thinking, "Where are Bert and Ernie???" The next passenger was a little retarded boy. "Hi, little boy. What's your name?" "My name is Ross, and my parents tell me I'm special." "Ross, I'm really glad to have a nice boy like you ride on my bus today. Climb on, and we'll leave in just a minute." The last person to approach the bus was a really strange looking man. "Hello, sir. What's your name?" In a surly manner he answered, "My name is Lester Creep!" For lack of anything better to say, he told him, "Lester, we're about to leave so please have a seat."

Now the driver was really thinking, "I thought I was going to meet Big Bird and Cookie Monster!!!" As he was pulling away from the curb, he looked in his rear view mirror. Much to his horror, he saw Lester sitting there with his shoe off, picking at a bunion or something on his big toe. "Oh, gross!" he thought. "This is nothing like I thought it would be! No Bert, no Ernie! Just a bunch of weirdos!!!"

He mulled it all over for a while, then suddenly he began to smile. He thought to himself, "Who would ever believe that, the first day on my new job I have two obese Patties, special Ross, and Lester pickin' bunions on a Sesame Street Bus?!?!"
Old 12-14-2010, 01:33 PM
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I've got some special sauce you can have...
Old 12-14-2010, 01:36 PM
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Where's the beef?


Old 12-14-2010, 02:39 PM
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