Lost a troubled friend..

[Schumi]

I got one of those calls tonight that you just never want to get..

I lived next to a neighbor girl growing up for about ten years- she was my best friend and her family and mine were very close. I cannot think of a lot of childhood memories where she wasn't there- I was an only child and she was like my sister. I eventually moved and we grew apart- she was about 4 years older than I and we lost touch after I moved. She ran with a rough crowd and her father, who was a good friend of the family, excommunicated her after time after time of bailing her out of jail, etc...

I haven't seen her in about 6 years- I had found out she had a kid, and he grew up- he's something like 8 years old now I guess. She had some scum boyfriends, got into drugs, etc. She lost custody of her boy a few years ago and he went to live with the father's mother, the only person around I guess. Last I heard she was getting better, had gotten back into touch with her mom and was spending time with her boy, supposedly out of her previous lifestyle.

Supposedly she was suffering a lot of depression, she was living with her mother, taking care of her, as her mother has terminal cancer.

This sunday she took a boatload of her mother's cancer medication, presumably washed down with a glass of vodka. She tucked her son into bed and told him she loved him and 'goodbye'. She was found dead the next morning, not sure by who.


Man, I'm just at a loss. I feel so bad, not just for her but for her little boy, who I have met a few times- he's a really wonderful kid given his circumstances (bum father, been tossed around from mom to grandmother etc). She was my sister growing up, and she's gone for good now- I had always hoped that I'd get to visit with her again some day as she was deciding to get back on track. The one decision she made that was permanent was the one to end it.

[slodave]

Very sorry to hear that, Mike.

[Racerbvd]

Sorry for your loss, it is never easy, no matter the cause, but some are harder to take than others..

[Geronimo '74]

Sorry to hear that Mike.
I feel sorry for the boy too, he obviously had a rough start in life and it just got worse.

[porsche4life]

Sorry to hear that, Mike. I still think about the classmate I lost to alcohol earlier this year quite a bit. Its one of those things that you just cant get out of your head....

[dtw]

I am really sorry for your loss. God speed.

[crustychief]

Sorry you lost a friend Mike.

[livi]

Terrible. Nothing worse than suicide. Really sorry to hear this, Mike.

[tevake]

Sorry for the loss of your friend, mike. Maybe there is some way you can have a place in the boy's life. Sounds like he could use a stable friend . Could be a good way to honor your memories of your friend.
take care, Richard

[wdfifteen]

I'm sorry to hear this. She must have been important to you. You never know the degree of pain some people live with until it's too late.

[Oh Haha]

So sorry for your pain.

[azasadny]

I'm sorry for your loss. Several similar experiences like that with us and that's never easy.

[stomachmonkey]

Very sorry to hear.

[VaSteve]

Mike, I'm sorry for your loss.

I see a lot of these threads and I don't comment, but I spent a while reading some of the older ones last night.

A fellow in our circle killed himself last week (Tuesday). He was a friend of my wife from years ago and they weren't especially close lately, life sort of takes over with kids and all. We were on the Chirstmas card list I guess is the best way to discribe the relationship. I can't even say that I knew him very well, but it's bothering the hell out of me.

Much like me, he was late 30's with a wife and 2 kids. His kids are a little younger than mine....2 and 3 months. He had a good well paying job in the same field as me.

Apparently, he left the office in the middle of the day and jumped off the building.

In his case, it was such a violent act and seemed so rash. In fact, it didn't even seem planned, but I head he was suffering depression and it was affecting him at work.

My wife went over and visited with his wife last Friday with our daughter. She said it was hard to do (I can't believe she did it) but said it really helped the widow. In this world of facebook, it was nice to have an actual person show up and help out with the kids.

Sorry for the hijack.

[daepp]

The poor boy - lost his new-found mother and his grandmother is terminal. So sorry for your loss.

[sammyg2]

I understand how frustrating that can be.
I used to do some volunteer work with folks in similar situations and in one case had a similar result.
That's partly why I get all fired up when some ignorant jack-wad starts spewing diarrhea of the mouth about how drugs should be legalized. I've seen what they do to good people and those around them.

[Schumi]

My mother was close with her family, she said something about how Tina had another child recently, or maybe had a failed pregnancy... I wasn't clear on the details as she tried to explain it all (my mother is pretty broke up over this as she helped raise the girl) but something with this pregnancy and being diagnosed with PTSD...

It sounds like a rough deal, maybe I'll find out more eventually. It's definitely a story that could be learned from.

[tabs]

You really loved her...

[scottmandue]

So sorry

[masraum]

Sorry for your loss. Yeah, suicide sucks, and I'm with Sammy about drugs...

My stepson got into drugs and committed suicide when he was 21. He'd had a troubled childhood, but seemed to be on his way to leading a decent adult life.