Seriously, though, most men (myself included) would get in trouble if we did nothing. But that doesn't mean I don't enjoy doing something special. Every year (well, this is year #2) I buy flowers and my youngest daughter (who's only in 1/2 day school) and I go to my wife's school (she's a teacher) and I have our little one carry the flowers in to give to her. My wife's face turns beet red, but we all get a kick out of it.

I took her to a 5 star restaurant with a degustation menu.
I got from her a framed photo of us and a blow job. No complaints from me!

I got my mistress a diamond tennis braclet, my girlfriend some JD Miller art work, my hooker got a pound of MMS-5-F White Widow...nothings cheap including love...