Kid got n trouble in schoo. What would you do?

[pavulon]

Originally Posted by look 171

Its a head pill to swallow when others tell me what to do my water, what car to drive, and what to do with my trash.

FYI: don't ever consider a career in healthcare.

[Tobra]

Good advice, sounds like you have a pretty good kid going there, good job.

[look 171]

Those that say have the boy fight their own battle is just BS. they are little 8,, so when an adult raises their voice, their little knee buckle and are completely withdrawn, especially coming from a school principle.

[MikeSid]

I think you should go all Buck Melanoma on that beyotch.



I'm kidding. Let it go. If your son brings it up again, give it some more attention and him the support he deserves. For now, it is just data for a lifetime of parenting to come.

[flipper35]

Originally Posted by scottmandue

Egg the principal's house!

Sheeze... am I the only voice of reason here?

With eggs from the teachers garbage! Then it is her fault.

[onlycafe]

in the dark old days we would resharpen a broken pencil with our pocketknives.
problem solved.......

today..... wait , that child has a knife! evacuate the school, run for your lives!

[sammyg2]

And so the bad behaviors and practices continue .....

[pavulon]

thread winner!

Originally Posted by flipper35

With eggs from the teachers garbage! Then it is her fault.

[nynor]

my son is in kindergarten and it has already started.

nostatic gave good advice.

[look 171]

Originally Posted by flipper35

With eggs from the teachers garbage! Then it is her fault.

hahahahaha

[nzporsche944s2]

I had a phone call from my 15 year old son's school saying he was involved in a "serious incident". The idiot (yes, my son) had decided to take a couple of fireworks to his school. Some other kids had seen them and one of the others presented a lighter and another one lit one on the school grounds.

Of course my son was culpable because he was the provider of the fireworks and for this he was facing a suspension or worse. The school were fingering my son as the prime instigator and the other two kids were saying my son had told them to do it. My son's version was that the other two had taken the fireworks on their own volition from his bag and that he wasn't even present when the fireworks were lit.

I knew, and my son knew, that he was in big trouble but my main focus was to minimise the impact of his stupid behaviour on his future. So I said to my son that he has to tell me in minute detail exactly what happened and be 100% honest with me about what happened - even if he was entirely to blame, I needed to know before we sat in front of the principal. I told him that if we were sitting there and some new "evidence" comes out that my son has not mentioned to me that he will lose all support from me and he will deserve everything he gets.

He repeated his story to me and I made notes.

We met with the Principal and the Dean the following day. He is a very old-school Headmaster and it is a traditional Catholic boys only school (think of the headmaster from Pink Floyd's The Wall and you would be close). The headmaster was solemn and reasoned in his summary of events and predominantly addressed only my son as though I wasn't in the room. But in his summary of events there were some crucial parts that clashed with my son's version. I made mental notes and waited with humility for my turn to talk.

When it was my turn I presented the slightly different version which, while not excusing my son's stupid judgment, did shift some of the responsibility. They made notes and it became obvious to me then that they were still in the evidence gathering phase and that the other boys were still being interviewed and my comments would come up in the questions to the other boys.

To cut a long story short, the outcome was that he had a month of after school detentions. He avoided Suspension or Expulsion.

The reason I've gone into this story is that sometimes you do have to back your son (child) if the "bigger picture" is at risk. Kid's can do stupid things - most of us have at some point growing up - but that is part of learning and growing. If my son were suspended or expelled it would have seriously altered his future at that school.

If I were the OP, I would meet with the Principal and present your version (if you have 100% faith in your son's version of events). Talk in a very reasoned non-confrontational manner and as one of the earlier posts said, build a bond with the Principal. Yes they do tend to be arrogant but that is partly their role as the "Camp Commander". I do not condone my son's extremely poor judgement in taking those fireworks to school and he was punished separately at home for his actions. He has learnt from the experience and grown from it and my bond with him became stronger because it encouraged absolute honestly when he knew his neck was on the block.

It is possible to turn this into a positive experience.

[sammyg2]

My son has gotten in trouble at school one time in his life, and faced expulsion for "bullying".

Seems they were playing basketball during PE in 7th grade and the teacher wasn't paying attention.
One of the kids was fouling my son every time he got the ball, and fouling him hard.

Now my son is a very tough kid in that he could break a limb and not complain or shed a tear, so he just ignored the other kid until he finally had enough.
He took the basketball and raised it above his head and acted as if he was going to shove it down the othe kid's throat, and yelled "KNOCK IT OFF".
That's it. Big friggin deal.

Of course the jackhole teacher turned around in time to see that very last part. He gave my son detention and paper picking up and threated expulsion because of their "zero tolerance (zero thinking) policy" on bullying.

So I went to school to discuss it with him.
He started his power trip, standing over me when I sat down and started lecturing me.
He was a couple inches taller than me but I backed him up until he was at the wall and I slowly and calmly explained to him that he was dead wrong, he was going to apologize to my son, and there would be no further mention of the incident or I would be back down there and he wouldn't like that.
I can't remember the exact words but I made it clear to that spineless POS that he was out of line and I was pissed.

He apologized to my son and there were no more problems from him, not even a cross look.

Bad behavior corrected.

[scottmandue]

Perhaps I was inappropriate with the egging suggestion... what do they call the flaming bag of dog poo left on the porch after the doorbell ring? Halloween is just around the corner... just saying

[nynor]

as long as you get the dog poo from her dog and the bag from her trash.

[look 171]

Originally Posted by scottmandue

Perhaps I was inappropriate with the egging suggestion... what do they call the flaming bag of dog poo left on the porch after the doorbell ring? Halloween is just around the corner... just saying

Scott, I am glad you live down in the south bay or I would be cleaning dog siht all day long at my house

[look 171]

Originally Posted by sammyg2

My son has gotten in trouble at school one time in his life, and faced expulsion for "bullying".

Seems they were playing basketball during PE in 7th grade and the teacher wasn't paying attention.
One of the kids was fouling my son every time he got the ball, and fouling him hard.

Now my son is a very tough kid in that he could break a limb and not complain or shed a tear, so he just ignored the other kid until he finally had enough.
He took the basketball and raised it above his head and acted as if he was going to shove it down the othe kid's throat, and yelled "KNOCK IT OFF".
That's it. Big friggin deal.

Of course the jackhole teacher turned around in time to see that very last part. He gave my son detention and paper picking up and threated expulsion because of their "zero tolerance (zero thinking) policy" on bullying.

So I went to school to discuss it with him.
He started his power trip, standing over me when I sat down and started lecturing me.
He was a couple inches taller than me but I backed him up until he was at the wall and I slowly and calmly explained to him that he was dead wrong, he was going to apologize to my son, and there would be no further mention of the incident or I would be back down there and he wouldn't like that.
I can't remember the exact words but I made it clear to that spineless POS that he was out of line and I was pissed.

He apologized to my son and there were no more problems from him, not even a cross look.

Bad behavior corrected.

From all my experiences dealing with high school ball coaches(especially football) are pretty much ass holes. I mean 99% of them including the ones I used to work with. Oh, yeah they coach high school ball, BFD. What makes them like that? Probably a dick as a kid, continues being a dick when they become adult doing the same f'ing things.

[nostatic]

Originally Posted by sammyg2

He was a couple inches taller than me but I backed him up until he was at the wall...

Guess it's a good thing you weren't in a stand your ground state...

[VillaRicaGA911]

why I don't put my kid in gubment school

[aap1966]

Forgive me if this is a point already made: use the episode as a way of teaching him sometimes life ain't fair, but (sometimes, not always) you just have to grit your teeth and bear it.

[Noah930]

Originally Posted by look 171

I never thought about the long term impact POP.

Thank goodness MISIS doesn't work.