"Can't use my tickets, you want them?" Need your opinion....
 

A relative of my wife has season tickets for the San Jose Sharks. He sent me the following email yesterday;

Hi guys,
I can't make the game on Wednesday night against Calgary 'cause I'll be in LA. Otherwise I'd be all over this. No work on Thursday except for eating and watching football. Does one of you want them?
Bob

My response;
You have two tickets? Justin and I would love to go!
Let me know if they're still available.
Thanks, Moses

His reply;
Dead-center Ice. They're yours. Heading out the door. I'll get in touch later.

So.... I called and during the conversation I offered to pay him for the tickets. I gulped a little when he said, "Sure, it's $234 for the pair".

Anyway, I've given away lots of tickets to family and friends when I couldn't use them. High priced tickets like Super Bowl tickets I might put on Stub Hub or be very clear from the beginning that the tickets were for SALE.

What does the Pelican braintrust think?

oh damn. too close to call :)

i probably would have backed out once i heard the price..but i dont understand hockey. at all...

I'm with you.

Sounds a bit bait n switch to me.

I'd say something like, oh, gosh that's more than I want to spend right now...

(and you need to do it ASAP so he doesn't blame you for causing him to not be able to sell the seats.)

(You're right, the fact is, these are expensive seats and he should have made it clear that they were offered for sale, not for free)

Sounds like he offered them for free. Since he wasn't using them and you offered to pay, he should have said "it will cost you two beers"..

Sounds like it might be a small misunderstanding. From his email I'd have guessed they were free, but re-reading it there's no such implication. He may well have been looking to sell them, just didn't couch it that way.

You did the right thing by offering to pay, and if it were me I'd also be surprised he accepted.

This would be hard to discuss after the fact without one or both parties feeling a little foolish. I know I would.

"....first $234 takes the pair" should have been included in the email. If I offer up tix to friends, relatives at the last minute it's always free or a simple "You pick up the bar tab next time" as an alternative payment.

I guess me and Hugh run in the same circles, you can buy us off with beer!

I'm with herr on this...you did offer to pay him for the tickets after all.

He'll probably come back and say "I understand....how about 1/2 price on them then?"

BTW the Flames are doing pretty well so far this season, I must say!:cool:

Seems from a quick read that they likely were free until you offered to pay for them....

Bait and switch, IMHO. Offering them up without the price and then accepting payment is pretty low.

I had a spare ticket to a show that I had originally intended to go to with my wife, but she was not feeling well. She insisted I still go so I took a friend along instead. Never asked him to pay, though he did offer.

It is hockey... they should pay you to go!

Tough call... sounded like he meant to give them away... but you offered to pay and he jumped on it.

a note to in-laws..
with no mention of $$ implies free as I read it..
all it took was one more word....
does one of you want to buy them...

Rika

I agree with gordy... Original email asks "Does one of you want them?" implies free, to me. He did not say, "Does one of you want them for $234?" or "Does one of you want to buy them?"

To me, no request for money = free.

Also, to me, he reaffirms this position when he replied to your email with "They're yours."
Your email did not offer to pay. You only said to let you know if they were available, and he replied with "They're yours."

When you offered to pay over the phone, he should have declined the gesture.

I learned a long time ago; Never trust anyone named Bob.

I don't think you can assume they were free.

You should have asked "How much?" in your first response.
At this point, you will be labelled a cheapskate if you back out.

You were awesome to offer to pay,

And he dropped the ball a little bit when he accepted your offer.

Email him back and say "Big thanks for the offer of the tickets but can't make the game after all."

All the language I read pointed towards this being a free offer.

I would have asked "what do I owe you" and expected something along "just get dinner next time we are in town", or "How about you send me a case of shells for duck season" or "Just send my kid a donation for their college fund" etc. making up for about 1/2 of the ticket cost. I would definitely NOT have expected to be asked for full price.

G

That's ****ty imo.......Had something similar happen years ago.....
Had a friend who had an extra concert ticket for ministry......sure man I'll go. ....
after we're inside i got told that he'd need the $65 bucks for the ticket by the weekend.....wtf?
he was a total dick about it, and to top it off the concert sucked ass.......never heard from him again until he needed something fixed on his car.....never returned that call.....

And everything about that first email says free......season tickets are already paid for.......can't go means they are going to get wasted......so who wants em?........
if he was expecting money for them he shouldve clearly stated that.....

Edit.....however.....you offered to pay for them......so they may have in fact been free until that offer to pay.....
i got nuthin lol

That email implies that he was giving them away since he can't use them. It was nice of you to offer to pay. Very odd that he accepted that offer.

We just gave our theatre tickets away to my BIL. We made it known that they were available and free since we weren't able to attend this show.

I can see the offer from the email going either way.
I think there is a difference between "Does one of you want them" (which could have an implied - pay me for them) vs "Could one of you use them" - as in, I can't so can you use them so they don't go to waste.

I have an RVing buddy who is three pay grades above me at least. He is a Sr. VP. He has seasons tickets to the Dodgers. When he has tickets he can't use, he always notes that they are for sale, or free.

You should have asked, "how much?" You can't just guess whether someone is giving something away or selling it and you can't really offer to pay for something but not really mean it, (get offended when they accept).

I agree that he was not clear on whether they were free or not but that's all the more reason to ask. At the end of the day, you went to hockey game and sat center ice with your son and paid face value for the tickets. Plus learned something about dealing with that relative. Don't give him any freebies. It will all come out in the wash, as they say.

I have given a number of tickets away in my life, sometimes to complete strangers, and never considered taking money - even when it was offered. I always felt that the money I paid for them was lost in any case and there was no harm in paying forward. Must add that I did however feel that those not at least offering to pay were rude, even given that I wouldn't accept their money.

In your case I certainly it was polite of you to offer, but I do feel his taking the money was a bit off.

The one instance that did peave me hugely though was when I gave tickets to someone who then went and sold them at more than face value (scalping?).

Typically I would expect to purchase unless otherwise stated.

One can infer all sorts of things (wishful thinking?) but your interpretation of what he wrote as opposed to what he actually meant cannot be held in judgement against him.

If you decide to back out, don't delay too long.

Best
Les

+1

Funny story: A neighbor had season tickets and gave two tickets for a game to another neighbor as a thank you for some neighborly deed. The recipient's wife was not interested in going, so he called me and asked if I would like to go, which I did.

The neighbor who was the source of the tickets inquired of the other neighbor if he enjoyed the game. He was told that his wife was not interested, so he invited me.

The donor then called me and asked me to pay for the ticket, since I was an unintended beneficiary.

Needless to say, we have not spoken since then and I did not pay him for the ticket.

As many of you have suggested, I'm absolutely certain the tickets were free until I offered to pay for them. No big deal, I'll have a great time with my son.

I'm not annoyed by the money. If he had asked up front I would gladly have paid for the tickets. The annoying thing is that it's a total breach of the unspoken "sports tickets etiquette" In my circle, offered tickets are always free unless specifically stated. Most tickets (these included) are corporate tickets. Either bought with corporate funds or written off as an entertainment expense.

Here's how ticket protocol usually works...

1) I offer a friend tickets I can't use.

2) He offers to pay. I refuse.

3) He sends me a thank you note or a bottle of wine after the game.

I'm not pissed about paying for the tickets, but I'd rather pay inflated prices on StubHub than be played by a family member.

If tickets are for sale, they're for sale. Seller mentions that in the initial offering. To not make any mention of price in the offering--and then expect to be paid--is breach of etiquette. Why would I agree to buy them if I had no idea whether they're a pair of $25 bleacher seats, or $1000 apiece luxo-box tix?

As they say, you can pick your friends, but you can't pick your family. Though you don't have to spend any time with them...

Just be straight with him. Tell him that you can't go because you did not realize the were so expensive when you offered to pay for them (Obviously if you wanted to buy them for full price, you would have bought them the same way he did). Maybe he will come back and offer them for a more reasonable price.

It's really not that big a deal. I can afford the tickets. I'm just always surprised when people behave in ways I never would.

All of my good friends are gracious and generous. They tip well in restaurants and treat people with respect. It's taken years to cull the herd. =)

In my world that is the Circle of Ticket Life, described exactly. Every transaction in life should be so simple, understood.

There is a parallel world in the lending and borrowing of farm equipment or asking for help when you need it: the only difference is return the item in the same or better shape and be ready to help when they need it. Oh, and beer rather than wine.

Philistine...

Is it his business or is he an employee of the business with access to the tickets.

Put another way, did he pay for them originally?

I just want to add after my previous post, his etiquette in this matter was awful. Total bait and switch. But you should have asked, "how much?", before agreeing to take them. That way, the other person has to clarify that they are free or tell you, "buy dinner some time", or give you the price.

I also do not associate with anyone who has bad manners or is not generous. They continually inspire me to be a better person and be more generous so I benefit from that as well as their generosity. :)

Crappy grammar and a crappy situation. His offer implied free. This guy is rather toolish.

I didn't mean you couldn't afford them, only that you likely would not have purchased them yourself knowing they cost that much (I assume if you thought it that important, you would already have tickets). In other words, you didn't necessarily value them at $234.

I guess it depends on how you offered to pay. Maybe he feels obligated to take your money...as not to hurt your feelings.

Don't let a misunderstanding screw up a friendship. Just tell him that you didn't realize how much they were when you offered to pay.

I would have read that as free as well.

Go and have fun with your son. I was in San Jose for work and went and saw my Wings play the Sharks. I couldn't believe they walked around selling sushi. I wanted nachos and a beer!

Bill