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-   -   Man card question. (http://forums.pelicanparts.com/off-topic-discussions/983114-man-card-question.html)

dlockhart 01-06-2018 01:23 PM

Deposit card ..

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wayner 01-06-2018 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unclebilly (Post 9874741)
I may have posted about this before...

Back in 2007 or 2008, I bought a repo’d travel trailer from an online auction. It was located in Georgetown, TX.

It sat there for maybe 3 weeks before I could go get it. I drove the 2600 Kms to go get this thing, picked it up and headed north. I was travelling with my dad.

First night, we stopped at the Walmart in Amarillo, TX. This was really the first chance I had to look it over. There was no point going through it at the auction site, I owned it.

Everything seemed to check out until I looked under the sink to find a Fxxking Rattle Snake coiled up under there... I swore, a whole bunch. I hate snakes.

Dad asked what was going on and I told him there was a rattle snake under the sink, he didn’t believe me until he looked himself. He asked if I had a hammer but all I had was a 36” pipewrench (oilfield hammer). Dad beat the snake 3 times with the business end of the wrench and flung it out the door.

So to recap, we have a lunatic (me) yelling and swearing in the Walmart Parkin lot (that part is to be expected), as some poor dude is trying to sleep in his Jeep Cherokee parked next to me. Next thing a large snake flies through the air and across the hood of the Cherokee.

We packed up and left - headed to a hotel...

I guess I traded in my man card that night. A few days later, at customs, I acted really evasive and shady hoping they would want to search the trailer (free snake check) but I guess I looked too trustworthy...


I liked one piece of advice on this board.

Someone who collected a lot of cars using an enclosed trailer routed his exhaust pipe into the trailer so that by the time he was home every creepy crawly, vermin and serpent was dead.

Bill Douglas 01-06-2018 01:46 PM

Hey hey hey, what about the spider. Catch him live - uninjured, and find him a nice place outside and let him go. If the female doesn't like this maybe she should go too.

john70t 01-06-2018 01:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baz (Post 9874987)
A real man would try to capture it alive and re-locate it outside.

I do that all the time with insects in the house.
Usually turning off the light get it moving and opening a window works.
Live and let live.

Then I saved a drowning bee from the bird bath:
"I'm bringing home a baby bumblebee,
Won't my mommy be so proud of me,

I'm bringing home a baby bumblebee,
Ouch! It stung me!

I'm squishing up the baby bumblebee,
Won't my mommy be so proud of me,"

cabmandone 01-06-2018 02:32 PM

I think the rule here is that you're only allowed to clench your cheeks but not so tightly that others in the room notice. No sounds are allowed to emanate from your mouth. Exiting the perch you were on in order to reach the insect is allowed but it must be done in a slow and controlled manner. I think directing the F word at the insect is allowable but only if you're telling it how lucky it was you didn't squish its f'ing ass.

Jims5543 01-06-2018 03:11 PM

Your mistake was trying to kill it.

I would have just set my house on fire.

Mark Henry 01-06-2018 03:36 PM

I just tell the wife "it's pest control, leave it alone"....so she gets my daughter to do it.

A real man uses his intelligence. ;)

wdfifteen 01-06-2018 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by scottmandue (Post 9874706)
For the win... except the proper tool would be a shotgun.

Yep. Bird shot in almost any gauge.

Steve Carlton 01-06-2018 06:33 PM

nom nom nom...

DanielDudley 01-07-2018 03:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by john70t (Post 9875124)
I do that all the time with insects in the house.
Usually turning off the light get it moving and opening a window works.
Live and let live.

Then I saved a drowning bee from the bird bath:
"I'm bringing home a baby bumblebee,
Won't my mommy be so proud of me,

I'm bringing home a baby bumblebee,
Ouch! It stung me!

I'm squishing up the baby bumblebee,
Won't my mommy be so proud of me,"

I just tell them that if they don't get out of my house, they are dead. Why don't they listen ? I save them at my discretion. When I lived in AZ, the black widows loved to nest right outside my front door. I put an end to that, and only upped the ante when they reappeared. Ever seen a thousand little tiny black widows crawling around your doorstep ? Die, Die, Foul Fiend.

KFC911 01-07-2018 03:45 AM

Real men have spiders as pets and don't ask "man card" questions on the Internet....

Give it up Vash :)

Crowbob 01-07-2018 07:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanielDudley (Post 9874920)
I was tearing out a wall years ago with a buddy who was built like a linebacker. inside the wall were two mice, looking out at us. My buddy pointed his hand at the mice to comment, and quick as a wink, a mouse jumped on his arm and ran up into his shirt. You should have heard the screaming as he danced and shook around until the mouse finally ran out his pant leg.

I just about died laughing, and you should have seen the look he gave me for doing so. He was no wuss, but I never saw anything like it outside of a Three Stooges movie

You kill biigassed spiders on the ceiling with a broom. Put a cloth on it, and beat the effing life out of it.

Ha!

Many years ago a friend and I were trapping muskrats on the river when I experienced my first exposure to severe entomophobia.

We were in a tiny canoe. I in front, he in rear. He, being 6'8" and disproportionately heavily muscled even for a giant, made my end of the canoe ride in the air with the gunwales on his end nearly at water level.

Anyways, somedamnhow one of those ugly-looking 1.5" white june-bug grub things with a black head ended up in the canoe. So trying to get it out of the boat I flipped it with my oar and toward him unfortunately it went.

Welp, were I not hanging on to the bow of that tiny canoe for dear life as my friend, screaming, screeching and bucking around trying to swat that little insect out of the air, then off his lap then on the floor of the canoe would probably have been funny.

Up he jumped in abject panic like his clothes were on fire, jumping and flailing and hollaring like I don't know what all. Oars and traps, dead muskrats, I and I assume one tiny uglybug went flying.

The amazing thing was that we survived the attack. Literally, one second he was Tom Sawyer and I Huck Finn. The next he were a screaming demon and I a surprised mass of discombobulated disorientation.

flatbutt 01-07-2018 07:08 AM

Way back when I was married my wife would call me at the lab to tell me that there was something dead or something that needed to be dead in the house. She would leave and not return until I had cleared the corpse. So if a man makes a sound and there is no one there to hear it......

javadog 01-07-2018 07:35 AM

Around here, 99% of the spiders that mistakenly think they can set up operations in my house are brown recluse spiders. They do not get relocated. If I could single-handedly eliminate this species, I would. I do my part but it is futile.

I have a friend that does pest control in Colorado. His territory includes all the high-end places to live in the mountains. His client base is wealthy and squeamish. They get very needy around the holidays, which makes for some fun stories and endless headaches for him.

JR

Holger 01-08-2018 12:47 AM

Woah, coffeee-out-the-nose-thread! LOL!


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