Man card question.
 

What sound are you allowed to make if:

Your wife tells you to kill a giant spider on the ceiling. ( spider is 0.75” diameter w legs)
As you are standing precariously on a chair reaching for it with an extraordinary amount of paper towels - wadded up; and it jumps “somewhere” in your direction?

Asking for a friend.

No sounds. Only loud, sharp expletives starting with either the letter "F" or "S." Possible consideration for using the word, "Oh" before the expletive.

Oh yeah, a real man would use a Glock.

A woman would wisely use a vacuum...slurp and gone.

No, a REAL man would get out a 30-06 with fixed bayonet. SmileWavy

For the win... except the proper tool would be a shotgun.

Scream like a little girl and throw the swatter to the wife.

I may have posted about this before...

Back in 2007 or 2008, I bought a repo’d travel trailer from an online auction. It was located in Georgetown, TX.

It sat there for maybe 3 weeks before I could go get it. I drove the 2600 Kms to go get this thing, picked it up and headed north. I was travelling with my dad.

First night, we stopped at the Walmart in Amarillo, TX. This was really the first chance I had to look it over. There was no point going through it at the auction site, I owned it.

Everything seemed to check out until I looked under the sink to find a Fxxking Rattle Snake coiled up under there... I swore, a whole bunch. I hate snakes.

Dad asked what was going on and I told him there was a rattle snake under the sink, he didn’t believe me until he looked himself. He asked if I had a hammer but all I had was a 36” pipewrench (oilfield hammer). Dad beat the snake 3 times with the business end of the wrench and flung it out the door.

So to recap, we have a lunatic (me) yelling and swearing in the Walmart Parkin lot (that part is to be expected), as some poor dude is trying to sleep in his Jeep Cherokee parked next to me. Next thing a large snake flies through the air and across the hood of the Cherokee.

We packed up and left - headed to a hotel...

I guess I traded in my man card that night. A few days later, at customs, I acted really evasive and shady hoping they would want to search the trailer (free snake check) but I guess I looked too trustworthy...

And then it will crawl out of the vacuum cleaner in the middle of the night and mercilessly exact its revenge.

Uh... no... spiders yes... poisonous snakes... no, free to run away.

Not if you spray a little bug killer into the vacuum hose...

I wouldn't panic. I found a nice tarantula this past week, put in a jar and gave it to my wife who took it to her first grade class. The result was she got a place for it to live from the science room, the kids named it George, they fed it crickets, and the kids love the thing. Try that with your spider.

Old school answer is that any audible sound other than perhaps a soft laugh costs one their man card until they redeem themselves elsewhere. Even if terrified, squealing like a girl/child does not provide relief/help...so might as well suck it up any be a man.

No sound. I kill anything and everything with my bare hands, spiders, snakes, tigers, cape buffaloes. Yeah, bare handed (Grunt). Now, I don't do roaches. I hate that pop and have to clean up the mess. Those thing are disgusting. Have my card damnit.

No animal/insect gets my heartbeat rate any higher than a big spider. I don't know why.
Mice, rats, snakes..no problem.

I prob wouldn't make much noise..but I wouldn't stop until I found it dead.

How much noise do you make when urinating..........

I was tearing out a wall years ago with a buddy who was built like a linebacker. inside the wall were two mice, looking out at us. My buddy pointed his hand at the mice to comment, and quick as a wink, a mouse jumped on his arm and ran up into his shirt. You should have heard the screaming as he danced and shook around until the mouse finally ran out his pant leg.

I just about died laughing, and you should have seen the look he gave me for doing so. He was no wuss, but I never saw anything like it outside of a Three Stooges movie

You kill biigassed spiders on the ceiling with a broom. Put a cloth on it, and beat the effing life out of it.

tiny spider under an inch

we have sparrow spiders 6 to 8 '' [I call them that as a bug ain't going to feed them]

Don't you hate it when you go to grab a chair and a paper towel then return...




And the spider is gone!

A real man would try to capture it alive and re-locate it outside.

If you really want to know.....

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!http://forums.pelicanparts.com/suppo.../gaapslaap.gif