WWVD-What Would Vash Do?
 

I come to work today and find two small bottles of cologne still in their boxes on my desk. They weren't there on Fri (left early for long weekend) so I guess they were put there after I left. All inquires to my co-workers are fruitless. Nobody knows nothing. I work in an office of women, there are nearly 20 of them and only 4 hairy legged dudes. None of the other dudes recieved cologne and my team leader wasn't out giving goodies for Memorial weekend.

Would you tell your wife?

Bo?

Yes.

I would evaluate my body odor situation very carefully. Maybe someone is trying to drop you a hint!

G

^^^
First thing I thought of. Sorry.

#metoo, I don't think I am smelly. Always freshly bathed before work.

I will be telling the bride.

HAHAH..

i would set them up near an open fire and try to shoot them with a .22.

^^^
Perhaps someone thinks that your cologne is cloy...too much, too sweet, etc.

Do this:
Find/research the MOST powerful gawdawful pungent cologne known to man.
Buy it.
Refill the "gift" bottles with it.
Lather on copiously. Soak it into clothing.
Loudly advertise around the office you are SO appreciative of the secret cologne gift, you wear it every day, and don't know how you ever lived without it.

If asked- show them bottles they bought, open em' up and slap some more on.
Openly acknowledge your deodorant was not cutting it, however, their cologne has solved everything. Thankyou thankyou thankyou coworkers!

This, fill them up with patchouli, and let them know how bad it really can be.
This place is a priceless . From now on, whenever I find myself in a tough situation , I will think WWVD?

What cologne DO you use? Powerful "oh so sexy" stuff? If so, lighten up. You're a grown man, right? Skin Bracer, aqua velva...after shave, not cologne. Good pit grease like speed stick...avoid the powerful stuff. If somebody a couple of feet away can smell your cologne, it's too damned strong. If your wife likes the stuff? Save it for your bedroom.

And fresh clothes too? Some people I know forget about that. It doesn't really help to shower if you get back into the same clothes EVERY DAY! :eek:

G

I worked with a couple of guys that put on too much cologne and it wasn't fun. Not that there's anything wrong with it...

I suspect that's the message you're getting. Consider it a good thing.

I don't wear any cologne, ever. My wife bought some for me about a decade ago and it is almost halfway done.

Fresh clothes, always a pair of clean scrubs.


I think some of you are blaming me for this harrassment. Victim blaming, I didn't ask for this and don't think I can function in such a sexist enviroment. I am taking my perfume and going home.

Maybe you have an admirer at work. That's good news...it doesn't have to go beyond that.

There's your problem....supposed to spray it on yourself....not cook it.:)

No wondering needed. Someone thinks you're a stinky f**k. Make a change.

honestly, if it was a B.O. issue, the thing you leave is a bar of soap or some deodorant. isnt that the universal sign for stink?

Somebody in bivenator's office is prepping him for lovemaking. He just needs to work through all the women methodically.