Tell us your "stupid move" story!

[mskala]

About 14 years ago I needed to change the wiper motor in the
914. Of course, that can't be done without removing the gas
tank . The tank was totally open and drained and I was
under the car with a worklight. Worklight was standard-type
bulb, and drop of (luckily) water from a drain hose hits bulb,
which explodes. The whole thing was like a foot from the open
empty tank, yet no boom luckily. Mostly for that reason I only
put those crappy flourescent bulbs in the worklight - way less
heat. It also lets you rest it inside the car without melting the
vinyl.
Mark S.
'70 914-6

[fogcity]

R & R turbo tail - 45 minutes.
Searching for screw dropped in engine compartment - 2 1/2 hours.

R & R electrical connecting wire from oil pressure sending unit - 10 min.
Searching for electrical connector dropped in engine compartment - 45 min.

Adjusting engine trunk door spring/latch - 5 min
Searching for dropped bit in engine comaprtment - 1 hour, 15 min.

I could go on and on.

[CHILI]

I was telling some of these hilarious stories to my dad this weekend while at the VARA race at Calispeedway. We were laughing and remembering some of our other "stupid" move stories. I remembered another one (I think this thread could go on forever, and would be worth it for the sake of great entertainment).

I was about 17 and had to drive my mom's car (bummer). I was backing out of the garage one day and for whatever reason, I decided to push the dang remote when I was about a quarter of the way out. I completely panicked and freaked out. I know, I know, I could have just pushed the button again, but I didn't. I popped the clutch and gassed it! I think I hit about 15mph in reverse without looking behind me. Heard this horrific sccccreeeeach, twweeeak! I think I sat in the car for a few minutes before I looked at the damage. WOW, it only caught the antenna. Of course it used to go back, now it was a nice z shape! Mom wasn't too happy. Could have been worse, though.

[1fastredsc]

Before i tore down the motor and trans, i removed the cruise control in my sc and went out for a ride. I have this habit of when i remove things i put the scres/nuts/bolts where they were so that i don't loose them in case i need them later. Well i put the screws that held the cruise arm to the throttle arm back on. When i took it out for a ride, i was curious as to why the throttle kept feeling sticky. Then i nailed it on a straight, let off the gas since there was a stop sign up ahead, and the throttle stayed pinned to the floor. I shut off the motor quick, slowed down, got out, checked my pants, then went to the engine bay and realized why it was stuck. Since there was no cruise arm attached the screws threaded in farther than they were meant to and got stuck against the throttle behind it.

[gregk1]

While working in the engine compartment I reached to turn on the key to check for power in the rear and turned to far and it started (IN GEAR!!) and went right thru the garage door and Knocked the tail light off my Harley before I got it stoped

[72 four door]

ok gotta another 1 its sorta along the same lines but not really i was driving my old stang and it was winter and the wipers would always build up with ice and i would reach out and snap it off ok well 1 time i did it and it caught my finger and it wouldnt let go[ 7 stiches later ] but the funny part was i couldnt turn off the wipers so a passerby had to stop and turn it off for me. hahaha at the time is was awful but it brings a good laugh at gatherings.

[Carrera Charlie]

I just returned from overseas and had to buy my first Porsche. Through a long chain of events, wound up in Idaho Falls, ID and consumated the deal on our '74 Carrera. Headed west with my wife (first time in America) and our infant son. Stop at a friend's place in Oregon on the second day and took him for a spin. Really wound the car up in 3rd gear and missed 4th gear - went to 2nd gear instead. Pegged the tach and the engine went dead. Towed it to the nearby Porsche dealer and found out I bent every exhaust valve in the engine. I had a full top end rebuild done over the next 11 days (mechanic was out at class first 5 days - no activity). Got to know my friend and his family VERY WELL over those 11 days. To add insult to injury, I took his car out to the store and had a fender bender on the way back! Finally got the car back ($$$$) and continued on our way.

Funny, haven't heard from him since ...

Cheers,

[CHILI]

Man, Charlie, I'm surprised you didn't just hang up your drivers license for good! Rough week

[TRE Cup]

A local mechanic helped me put together my first 911 back in 1974. After bombing around in it for a year, I felt it was time for some servicing. Bought a fuel filter, plugs, etc. Got thru most of the service and then i double whammied myself:
Changed the fan belt and started the car up. While I was revving it up and down, i heard a distinct "wuf- wuf" sound that was rpm related. The more i revved it up, the faster the "wuf- wuf " sound was. What the @#$%&*?? so .... i walked around back to see what on earth was this unusual sound: The kleenex box i had left by the back of the fan was feeding the motor quite well. "wuf" and another kleenex disappeared into the alternator fan to hide under the fan shroud with 200 of its brothers and sisters. After laughing at myself for 5 minutes, i began the task of learning about alternator/ fan removal and installation
Later the same day: with my newfound courage in turning wrenches on this teutonic beast, i felt it was time to replace the fuel filter and finish what i started. So, the clamps on the early cis filter get loosened and shifted back over the hoses. I pull one hose off, and then try to pull the other one off. Pul,, pull, pull- hmmm... this is kind of tough, i am thinking. Ok- one last pull and yes! all the dirty gas come shooting out directly into my eye! ooh this burns!!- run back into house, tripping over tools and parts left in pathway.. To this day, nightime vision in one eye is diminished
Priceless ,these little things we do!

[GSpreeman]

My uncle gets credit for this one. He was an insurance salesman and was putting tons of miles on his car each year. He always drove Chryslers. The Desoto dealer calls up my uncle and tells him the new Desoto just arrived with a cast iron transmission. The ads read, "you can take it up to 60 mph and put it in reverse and this transmission will keep on running." So, my uncle goes over to the dealer to test drive the new Desoto, takes it out by himself, gets it up to 60, drops it in reverse and laid out the transmission and various engine parts for the better part of a 1/4 mile. Walked to a farm house, called the dealer to tell him to bring out his car and a towtruck.

This was the same uncle who took on the challenge of, "who gets better gas mileage?" He and his friend agree that it should be the same driver so that each car is driven the same. My uncle takes out his car, gives it gas going up hills and puts in the clutch on the way down. Takes his friend's out and floors it up the hills and puts on the brakes going down. My uncle's Chrysler averaged 16mph. His friend's averaged 4mph. His friend was so pissed he went in to the local Desoto dealership...see above.

[stormcrow]

I did a rebuild on my P-engne and before I installed it I wanted to check the compression. The engine was completely assembled and ready for installation.

When I checked I only had 25 psi max on any one cylinder. Come to find out, I never removed the glaze from the cylinders after I installed the new rings and they wouldn't seat properly. Had to disassemble down to the cyilnders and do it over.

On a lighter note, my next door neighbor was having front end problems with his van. He took it to the garage where they said it would cost him about $800 to replace the front inner/outer bearings along with new discs.

He decided it was something he could do himself so on Saturday afternoon after completing the project he took the van for a drive. It ran fine for about 1/4 mile when it started to vibrate like crazy.

He brought it back to the house and couldn't figure what the problem was. Well, he ended up thaving it towed to the garage to have them check it out. Come to find out he never installed the inner bearings on both wheels and ended up having to replace the spindles along with the new discs that he installed. Cost - not sure but well over the $800 mark. He wouldn't tell me.

Steve

"A Porsche does more then just go fast in a straight line"

[76 silver targa]

Here one from a real dumb a$$

Had my P-car for about a month. Drove it to work that day with the Targa top off, it was a very nice morning. Around lunch it started to cloud up so I run out to put my top back on. No problem. At noon I leave for lunch, get about 50 feet down the road before the front hood comes slamming straight up. Needless to say I could'nt see a thing. slowed down and pulled over latched the hood went home and changed my underwear.

[jmz]

I just got my car running and driving a few weeks ago and last week I was tooling around town with a buddy. He drives a track prepped 350Z ...nice new car. At any rate on the way back from looking at an S-4 Audi for another friend myself and the 350z meet at a stop light. My window is down b/c no a/c he rolls his down and asks if I want to drag race...man was I glad to do it! I really wanted to see how the old girl compared to a newer car. ...ok so I haven't driven my car or a manual shift much for about 2 1/2 years. Anyway light turns green, he screams off and I am left there in neutral reving my engine. Damn! ...so I wait for the revs to come down ...still grinded a bit trying to get into first and I zip off. I tell him what happened and we both laughed about it. I told him I would follow him up the freeway ramp to see if he could pull me. Man was he surprised when I stayed on him like glue. I think I would have beat him at the light if ...

[adamred]

Oh God TRE I just about s**t my pants....

[CHILI]

Steve,

I did that too. Only when I got out, there were two big chips in my paint and dents on top of the wiper tray. Plus, the corners of my hood were bent up ever so slightly. Why did you have to remind me!

Lesson of the day: Latch your hood!!!!!!!!!!

[76 silver targa]

chili,
Mine too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
left that part out so i wouldnt look like a complete bone head. I get enough of a reminder every time i go into the garage

[Sarah]

The 1st summer we had the 930 I took a tight right turn coming off a parkway and bashed my right rear rim on the curb & took a small chunk out of the tire. Ughh...That was a horrible sound...and yes...plenty of people by the lakes saw it. Ouch.

Lesson learned: Don't take tight turns around curbs with a wide-body.

[CHILI]

Ahh hah! I knew Sarah wasn't perfect! LOL

[TRE Cup]

Sarah,
check out the control arm on that side- a lot of times the adjuster area of the arm gets cracked when it gets thumped. You can get it welded and realigned as a fix

[Rob McKibbon]

My car was out of commission for 4 or 5 days waiting for replacement CD Box. Once box arrived I realized the points were not opening. Felt very stupid. I have a spare CD Box now.

edit: also electronic ignition added

Also put a dwell meter on my distributor..... luckily when it didn't work I left it alone and there was no problem; but my wrench said i could've needed that replacement CD Box for that one?