admit to your stupidity

[joe payne]

This topic is perfect for me at the moment. I found a set of NOS French Yellow H 1 lens's for my 911 on Ebay in Germany, and received them about a month later, put them on the car and went back to the car about 2 days later to see that one of them cracked from the mounting screw up. This is what I learned...
DON'T OVER TORQUE THAT DAMN SCREW!!!!

[Steve Nantz]

Walking up to the counter at the local auto parts store.... lots of guys at the counter talking cars.... and asking for a 'rear tail light bulb.'

The salesman looks at me and with a straight face says, "OK mister, that's for your REAR tail light......" The place breaks up, of course.

My premier Homer Simpson moment. Doh!

[slow&rusty]

Last oil change....wasn't looking and kicked over the basin holding 11+qts of old oil all over the garage floor.....

That was a nice clean-up...

Yasin

[Oracle]

maybe 18 years ago I had a 1974 Datsun and I knew the battery was not really well supported thanks to all the rust... so I just jammed a plastic bottle or something to keep it in place... you know to "support" it.
Well I'm there just about to stop in front of the her house for the first date... and I see smoke coming out of the air vents... so I park the car in Neutral and use the parking brake - I don't know why because the street is pretty steep...

So I'm there looking at the car and all the smoke and she comes out and I start acting up all cool like everything was under control then she hints the car is on fire and moving!
Holy *****!!! I ran for the car down the street and jumped in like a Duke of hazzard but head first! so I had to press the brake pedal with my hands while my feet out the window... finally I stopped the car without hitting anything... this time I chose [P] as in Park so I opened the hood and starred to all the wires being fried and red hot, very slowly but steady... I finally looked at the battery and found it stuck to the metal body so with my foot I kicked it and like magic all burning stopped...

Later I found that the parking brake cable snapped because it was red hot and melted in a joint...

The date went Ok and had lots of affection... :-)

I still can't believe Dad paid to get that POS fixed then the motor had to be rebuilt then the supension cause I cut the springs a bit too much... Probably that's been the most expensive car in the family... I know I contributed..

[daltvater]

My first oil change last night...even after reading and being told many times to open the plugs on the basin, take one guess at what I didn't do.

[Drago]

She's just marking her territory

[GothingNC]

Working on my 75 bug years ago I was installing the stereo and for some reason I connected a wire from the ground to a hot lead on the fuse panel in the trunk

Sparks started flying and I yanked the wire off which has fused itself to my finger, ouch !!!!

I was glad that there were no gas vapors lingering around from the fuel tank.

2nd mistake,

A 35 year old Continental knobby snow tire used as a spare will not get you far in the summer. It disintergarated in about 2 miles.

[sand_man]

Note to self:
"...self, when rebuilding the OEM blow off valve (BOV) on an '87 930, be sure to use something to help hold the pieces togther while you re-assemble. Things can slip and that long spring with a metal piston sitting in it can fly out and hit you in the face (right in the bridge of the nose)..."

Note to self:
"...self, if you're too lazy and/or studpid to remember and heed the first note to self, be sure to wear protective face and head gear..."

Dumb @zz signing off

[Jim Smolka]

I am sofa king stew pid

1. Front Carrera calipers on the wrong side. Guys at the shop were amazed I even had brakes

2. 914's starter not working. Pulled car up driveway with motorcycle and a rope. Rope broke. Car rolls into corner of mom's house. Luckily, shrubs took the brunt of the damage.

3. Forgot drain plug while changing oil on brother's Jeep

4. Installed dual MC system. Had rear wheel lockup problem. Thought setting bias was done by the 2 rods that go to the each MC. Had friend help and showed him what I was adjusting. Pointed to the balance bar adjustment, kind of a teeter-tooter thing.

5. Changed oil on Explorer, forgot to check that the old oil filter gasket did not stick to the motor. Installed new filter. Nice oil trail up the drive way.

The joke in our group of P-Car guys is to determine who is Sofa King for the day

[Christien]

Alright, time to revive this thread with (I believe) my second entry! (maybe my third? and those are just the ones I admit to!!)

I'm having electrical "issues" with my 944, so I was going to pull the battery to put it on the charger. Yank out the 10mm wrench to undo the leads. This is late afternoon, after half A day at work and the other half xmas shopping, so I'm tired, not thinking. I'm pulling off the positive and turn the wrench a bit too far, far enough for it to connect with the body. ZAP!!!! Sparks everywhere and me yelling "F!#K!!!" really loud on a quiet cul de sac... oops... Now where's that "embarrassed" smiley? Oh, there it is!

[haycait911]

stupid speeding story-- was traveling thru washington state in summer in my 914, lovely day, doing 120pmh plus, as I was coming up behind a white car on a long straight, and was getting ready to swoop past, my wife comments " that car sure has a lot of antennaes " . he was NOT impressed. Don.

[DaddyGlenn]

Ages ago.... fourth or fifth time rebuilding an old VW bug motor (not stock) got it all back together but it wouldn't start. I got a few backfires that's it. Ran the battery down trying to start it. Pushed it up and down the driveway several times trying to start it. everything was set perfectly! paid big bucks for a tow to the local VW shop and after several hours or labor $$$ (big dollars for an early 20's kid i.e. me) the diagnosis...

I installed the cam 60 degrees off. (cam gear had three bolts...)



Same car, different rebuild ...installed high pressure oil relief springs...blew up the filter like a balloon. yes it burst and sprayed oil all over my parents driveway.

[Craig 930 RS]

Fiat X1/9 engine rebuilt in the early 1980s...........time cam off the #1, right?
Nope. With the Fiat motors, time off #4. Had it exactly 180 degrees off.......push started, rolled it down the hill etc. No start, no *****.
Duh.

[RSBob]

Refinished the ****es/Fooks/Fukes and tightened the lugs while the car was in the air just enough to make sure they where hub-centric. When on the ground I was going to torque them properly. Well got distracted, and one thing led to another and never got around to torquing them. After admiring my fine work I took the car out for a spin a couple of days letter. Everything felt fine the first 5 miles and then things started feeling really sloppy. A little sloppey then started feeling really wobbly and I knew I was in real trouble. Fortunately, the light went on and I got the car stopped and pulled over while the tires were still barely hanging on but the lugs were backed almost completely off. I was very lucky that day.

[Jeff Alton]

A while ago, and a little too late at night in the garage, I was installing my favourite JE wristpin clips and this is what happened. Then we made a tool that installs them easy in about 5 seconds each. This one cost me 7 hours in the hospital emergency room (waiting) and a few stitches.



Live and learn (maybe) its not the first time I was working when I should have been in bed!

Cheers

[billroth]

Not on a P but stupid anyway.

A buddy and me were changing the tires on his Audi. Lug bolts were on very tight. We have two wheels changed (one at a time) and he starts to loosen the third while I torque up the second. Anyway, third is on very tight, and he asks me to try after he was trying for a while. Well, we are literally jumping on the wrench until he notes that it seems as it actually getting harder to loosen it as we go. The light bulb goes off. Tightening instead of loosening. The head of the bolt was significantly deformed.

[catspaw]

Not a car story but it took place in a garage. Rememeber the original "pop guns", the ones you with a string and a cork? Well this is 1954 I'm 4 years old and we are in the process of moving into a new house and the garage is full of stuff including firearms and ammunition. So in the attempt to impress one of the kids on the block I drop a 180 grain 30-06 cartridge down the barrel of the pop-gun, aim at a Chock full o' Nuts coffee can and touch her off. The gun barrel looked just like Elmer Fudds guns in the Bugs Bunny cartoons, a banana peel effect of the highest order. I hit the can, I still have it. I'll post a pic tonite. I still have two eyes too.

[Craig 930 RS]

Do! Great pop gun story.....

[stallturn]

As a bit of an afterthought I did a bit of last minute maintenance on my 911 the night before the trip to Le mans and then travelled the 380 miles down there the next mourning, opened up the back over a leisurely beer that evening at the camp site to show somebody some small mods I had done and found the dip stick,alternator C spanner and oily rag staring at me from inside the engine bay.

whoops

[catspaw]

Photo to pop-gun story