I'm in Minnesota for some sad family business, my stepdad who turns 87 this month is in rapidly declining health and I wanted to spend a little time w him. We have never had the closest of relationships but he was a fantastic husband to my mom for the last 45 years until her death in Feb.'18 and I'm eternally grateful for that.
I want to help him out in any way I can but it's questionable how much he will accept it. At least I'm trying.
I only have one set of aunt/uncles left alive and it's my dad's younger sister and her husband. My uncle JG is 91 and took a bad fall last year and broke his neck. Remarkably, he survived and recovered somewhat but has lost a lot of mobility so they had to sell their beautiful home in suburban Minneapolis and move into assisted living. My aunt is 10 years younger than him and in excellent health but she isn't strong enough to lift him if he goes down, etc. He's in a wheelchair most of the time.
I went and had dinner w them at the new place last night, (a really nice assisted living in Edina), had a great time yapping about various cousins and some family history. We have a huge extended family so this could go on forever.
My uncle enlisted in the Navy when he turned 18 in 1945 and the war promptly ended while he was in training for his service job, aviator communications. His amazing luck continued through life, marrying the love of his life and having 9 healthy children, (we're Catholic). He attended St. Thomas Academy, an excellent Catholic military HS in St. Paul that is an ROTC school so 100% of the grads went straight into the service and the HS classes immediately prior to his were decimated in WW2.
He has led an exemplary life like most guys of his generation, he has scored 10.0 as a husband and father. One son played hockey for U of Minnesota, (big deal around here), one son played baseball for "the U", another was a Navy pilot, daughter who is an accomplished artist, about 100 grandchildren and many great grandchildren now. Just a total win.
Still, the end is sad. To see the man lose all physical strength and have to depend on others is brutal. To call this guy physically and mentally tough would be the understatement of the century. He was built like Popeye and I swear that up until about age 88, he could still kick my ass. I had to lift him into his chair last night after he slipped trying to do it himself. He is the type who laughs at adversity and raising 9 good kids was just no big deal.
The best part of all, though, is the relationship I have w him now. My aunt has always loved me because aunts just do and we are blood. As a long-haired, stoner teenager, he did not exactly admire me and made no effort to hide it. The dislike was mutual. He is extremely conservative. Somehow, 50+ years of life and the myriad experiences he has had have changed him and I'm not that young hesher anymore, either. He has openly gay grandchildren that he loves and a couple of his kids have even turned out liberal which I'm sure is a disappointment but family is everything to them and no one gets tossed aside.
What we both missed out on earlier in life is that he has a great wit and is an amazing conversationalist and I can actually tell a story sometimes myself. We laugh and hug every time I see them, it's a delight. Not sure why I typed this out other than to share a story of a good man living a great life. Everyone go out and live to the fullest today!