huge technicolor ejaculate oozing out of the bike lane
Hahaha
nice verbiage.
I can answer the "why lycra". Having just bought a bike (actually a hardtail mountain bike which I have chucked slicks on for city riding in the interim) and having discovered the pains of the seat, I can assure you that reasons 1 & 2 below are enough to make a man wear lycra:
1) there is padding (the seats don't have much)
2) that padding is chamois, which wicks moisture away from the, err, privates etc, and prevents "saddle sores"
3) lycra apparently holds the lg muscles better together, (so I'm told)
I bought lycra "underwear" with the padding. It goes under my shorts so I can preserve some dignity. I get the feeling I will change to full lycra once the shred of remaining dignity is gone.
I don't understand the sponsorship thing either.