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Penetration should be the issue discussed here. Last thing you want to do is to crow to your neighbor how you shot a home invader with your 44 mag, and them telling you your round went through your intruder, your door, their wall, their refrigerator and their child.
Typically a home defender only recalls firing a few rounds. Usually they clip is empty when it is reviewed by police. Adrenaline is a funny thing. Just do a test. Next time you are at the range with your buddies, put an arbitrary number on the amount of rounds you can shoot from the clip. Bet most of them can't do it.
Round nose bullets should never be used for home defense, they just go right through the target, and keep going. Last thing you want. Hollow points that expands on contact and stops? Yes. Will they to a bunch of damage to the initial target? YES!
Do they travel too far outside your initial target, or your unintentional target? No!
Stopping power isn't necessarily the round size. It will be the damage the round does on contact. Bigger rounds will go further. My preference is a round that will expand and bounce around in their body.
She should shoot what is comfortable for her. I have the same issue with my wife, she likes the 22 rifle, but it is not good for the shape of our home, several narrow hall ways that would impede bringing the rifle to bear.
I think a .380 would be perfect for my wife, as the handles are usually smaller, and fits her smaller hands. (I did marry a girl with small hands) Low recoil, and she should be able to double tap.
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