[fintstone]

Be judicious about taking things and privileges from them expecting them to respond like you would...and maybe did as a youngster. It may not work...and if it doesn't work, eventually you run out of things to take. Then, by definition, they have nothing to lose (or believe they do not). You do not want that situation as it is oddly empowering...and could empower them to act out in a more extreme and more dangerous way. This can result in new risky behaviors. Goal oriented rewards with lots of small successes may work better. The end result must just be relatively real to them an relative short termed. While teens are past the tree house/fort building stage, what could work for a young man might be building a car or motorcycle for them over time (as a series of projects)...if that interested them. Maybe for a young woman, it might be a foreign language that results in a trip to that place with a friend or dance or music lessons that end in some sort prom or possible demonstration. Maybe start prepping for a marathon with a goal to run at Boston as a unranked participant (and accompanying fun trip). We all want to be the star of our own little production in life, whatever that is. Most probably just seem out of reach to teens....especially now.