[asphaltgambler]

I am the youngest of 4, 3 boys - 1 girl - I am the last of the 'Boomers age 62+. My parents were both prime examples+ of the Greatest Generation. The had me late in life, both @40, there is considerable age difference between me and my oldest brother. He was starting his first year of college when I was starting kindergarten.

My mom lived until 86, last of her years with dementia, Alzheimer's, loss of recent memory, and a lot of health issues associated with that at the end. My father almost made it 90. Throat cancer towards the end from life-long cigarette use, even though quitting at age 55.

After being Blessed at having both of them in my life so long........losing my mother........was, of course.......huge. But losing my father.................there are no words. It was when I realized that now they're gone, most all of their contemporaries had already passed, there was no one left. That emptiness was devastating. So much so I just could not get past him leaving us. Eventually, I did fully grieve the loss of both of them, started to unpack a lifetime of baggage through Christian counseling. That's when I fully understood my mortality. I forgave my next older brother for essentially an entire life of his unprovoked constant jealousy against me, broken promises, being verbally and physically inappropriate with my girlfriends and wives, cheating me out of deals and money.

Summary is: I am now a changed man. I think in many ways as long as at least one of my parents were still living, I was still their child. It was then that I decided to try to run as good of a race as my dad and mom in my remaining time here on earth. Last night, I told them both.......... I'll see them in a second....................