[Seahawk]

That last picture will break your heart...

While I have lost friends, each I spend a moment with today, the one loss that hits closest to home for me was when I was the COS for a large Program Executive Office at NAVAIR.

A Yeoman First Class checked onboard to support the staff and Admiral and I was delighted to meet her. We needed the help and we sat in my office for her in-brief.

I always ask about family first, where are you from, etc. I did so with her.

She started crying - not the I stubbed my toe and it hurts crying, but a guttural, primal angst.

Her husband, a Marine H-46 crewman, was killed in the early stages of Iraq when his H-46 was either lost or shot down.

I had no idea and felt like a complete fool for not knowing. It was my fault, part of my job to know.

I was soon to be promoted to O-6, been scuffed up, seen things and had been to many funerals wearing the long blue coat.

In a former tour I had to separately call the parents of a young Marine pilot (I rented a room from him when I was at Sikorsky) to tell them that their son had died in a wreck. That was hard.

But nothing, and I mean nothing, could have prepared me for the young woman in front of me, so in love with her husband and their future together that she simply could not control her spasms of grief because it was all gone.

She is the other side of Memorial Day: The families, especially the young spouses and children.

I think of her often. We were able to get her the help she needed at her pace and preference. As it should be.

My best YN1.