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zakthor zakthor is online now
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: beaux arts, wa
Posts: 1,402
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Originally Posted by red-beard View Post
The Rules

https://www.velominati.com/



Rule 9 // If you are out riding in bad weather, it means you are a badass. Period. Fair-weather riding is a luxury reserved for Sunday afternoons and wide boulevards. Those who ride in foul weather – be it cold, wet, or inordinately hot – are members of a special club of riders who, on the morning of a big ride, pull back the curtain to check the weather and, upon seeing rain falling from the skies, allow a wry smile to spread across their face. This is a rider who loves the work.



Rule 5 // Harden The **** Up.



Rule 12 // The correct number of bikes to own is n+1.While the minimum number of bikes one should own is three, the correct number is n+1, where n is the number of bikes currently owned. This equation may also be re-written as s-1, where s is the number of bikes owned that would result in separation from your partner.



Rule 27 // Shorts and socks should be like Goldilocks. Not too long and not too short. (Disclaimer: despite Sean Yates’ horrible choice in shorts length, he is a quintessential hard man of cycling and is deeply admired by the Velominati. Whereas Armstrong’s short and sock lengths are just plain wrong.) No socks is a no-no, as are those ankle-length ones that should only be worn by female tennis players.

Rule 28// Socks can be any damn colour you like.White is old school cool. Black is cool too, but were given a bad image by a Texan whose were too long. If you feel you must go colored, make sure they damn well match your kit. Tip: DeFeet Wool-E-Ators rule.
Yeah… i self identify as a single speed mountain biker. I wear my bibs outside my shirt so its easier to take a dump. Color? Sock length? Velominati are a bunch of poofs.

I can stop now. Didnt make sense that in the wet i use one finger on mtb but cant stop at all on road bike - thats the bad sort of fear.
Old 06-12-2023, 05:35 PM
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