[unclebilly]

My father has been in a dementia care facility since early August. It’s sad because he still has moments of normalcy about 20% of the time and he can’t really associate with his fellow residents during that time. Since last week, we are trying to take him out once a week (he had to adjust first). He really enjoys the outings and either my brother or I (with my kids) visit him 5 days per week.

The great thing about a dementia facility is that they understand (and tolerate) residents with dementia so odd and abusive behaviours that we feel embarrassed about are all part of their ‘normal’.

Putting my dog down last week was extra difficult because I kept thinking about what it will be like to say goodbye to my father when his time comes (not that we’d put him down) but it does feel like we put him out to pasture by moving him into long term care.

I had a really good chat with one of the senior staffers at the facility last week and she said that we need to focus on our father -son moments and what we have left. Their role is taking on all of the dirty work and keeping him safe so we can just enjoy his company. It’s important to understand this.