We took our boy Owen to the vet yesterday. Came home without him.
For the first time in over 40 years, I do not have a dog in my life. Only memories and photos.
Owen had been diagnosed with congestive heart failure last September and we were told he could have a few months to a year to live. Lately he has been making coughing and choking sounds at night and sometimes during the day. The vet said his chest is so full of fluid he isn’t getting enough oxygen. He is basically being strangled by his own body. There were things that could have been done to put off the inevitable, but we all knew he was going to die, and soon. The only question was how much we all would suffer in the meantime.
Vicki is heartbroken.
I’m not.
I feel like crap because I should be heartbroken too. I’m sad, but I’m also relieved. This brings up the memory of losing Maddie two years ago. Losing her broke my heart. Honestly I don't feel the same heartbreak over Owen's passing. Owen was always a problem child, and his health and behavior issues are behind us now.
The house feels eerily empty today. This is going to take some getting used to.
Vicki got Owen after our 7 year old grandson died. I guess she though he could to fill the hole in her heart. I was never fully on board with that decision; I had Maddie.
Maddie was a bit skeptical about having a new baby in the house, but she quickly accepted him. He always knew she was the alpha dog.
He liked to take rides in the truck.
An old shoe was his favorite toy.
When Ownen (yes we called him Ownen a lot) was a puppy we weighed him by putting him in a salad bowl on a food scale. He was 2.5 pounds when we got him.
Owen always had health problems. He spent a week at the Ohio State University veterinarian school. $$$$$$$$$!!
Gracie died last July. We've lost 3 dogs and a cat in the past 22 months. Repetition doesn't make it any easier.
Maddie was and remains the love of my life. I lost her almost two years ago. I'm crying today, but mostly over the memory of Maddie.