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You are in my prayers, Steve. It is one of life's tragedies that we lose our parents along the way. We all know that, but it still doesn't make it any easier.
As far as the rust, start with some WD-40 and just your finger. If that doesn't do it, try a piece of course cloth. If that still won't do it, try the finest scotchbrite you can find. If it's more stubborn than that, then go to the finest steel wool you can find. Work slowly, keeping it wet with WD 40. You can apply a lot of pressure when using your finger or the cloth, but lighten up when using the scotchbrite and especially when using the steel wool.
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