[adrian jaye]

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Save on booze by drinking cold tea instead of whisky. The morning after,you can create the effects of a hangover by drinking a thimble full of washing up liquid and banging your head repeatedly on the wall.
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Recreate the fun of a visit to a public swimming pool in your home by filling the bath with cold water, adding two bottles of bleach, then urinating into it, before jumping in.
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Don't buy expensive 'ribbed' condoms, just buy an ordinary one and slip a handful of frozen peas inside it before you put it on.
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