[Mule]

Imam Ahl keel Yo Momma announced today that the volume of martyrs showing up in the seventh level of heaven has resulted in a shortage of virgins. This high volume has forced Allah to revise the long standing 72 virgins & 8 little boys offer for martyrs downward to 25 ex-hookers & 2 old queens. In a press release Allah went on to say that continued high volume may result in further downward adjustments.