[lendaddy]

Sup,

I was laying in bed last night probably about 2:45 A.M. as I usually do. But this time instead of thinking about business or politics I couldn't get this vison out of my head. It was a vision of me coming home to my wife and son having to tell them that I had cancer and having to look at their faces knowing the pain my stupidity had caused them. It was kinda a half dream half awake thing, but it wigged me out. Then I started thinking about how stupid I'm going to feel when the effects start to hit me later in life. I envisioned myself in the docs office when he says "I think you should sit down". Again, totally wigged out, I got chills. Like I said, I HAVE to do this.