[M.D. Holloway]

dude - your wife is a bonafide hottie fer sure. It is so tough when they look so good - but be strong my brother! Help is on the way. As my ol man used to say, "theres more than one way to kill a cat then F^&%in it to death!"

Here are a few proven techniques that works like a charm. If carried out, you will get back "hand". Here are two of many...(the rest come with a fee!)

1) BE THE MAN WOMAN: Provide complete attention immediateley for no less than 5 minutes - and don't say a word! Just acknowledge. The set-up: Woman always seem to want to "talk" when the news, sports, CSI, Law & Order or Blue is on. Do This: Turn off the TV, turn your body to face them and say"tell me about it, I'm interested..." She will prattle on. Let her. FOR GOD"S SAKE DO NOT OFFER A SOLUTION TO THE PROBLENM SHE IS POSTING! Just listen. You may miss up till the first commercial break - no biggy. This may take 3 to 5 times, but it reduces her option of the common gripe "We don't talk anymore, you don't know who I am and I don't know who you are." this will set up for 2).

2) DOUBLE REVERSE PYSCHOLOGY (with a little passive aggresive enabling): Case in point; last weekend I was shooting the breeze with George the neighbor, the curtain climbers are running around doing I don't know. My wife comes storming out of the house and tears me a new rectum for not watching the little rascles - felt real embaresed. About a half hour later I said these majic words "Honey, I'm sorry I let you down. But more so, I'm sorry if I have ever said something or acted a certain way in front of your friends that may have made you feel less than a woman or embarressed you. I know how it feels and it really sucks. I want to be the best thing in your life and I intend to try to meet those expectations." NOW HERE IS THE KICKER - YOU HAVE TO DO IT WHILE YOU ARE ON THE CAN! Yes, I know it sounds absurd, but call her into the bathroom and have her listen to you but more importantly, she has to see you on the throne! You are "must vunerable", let her have the precieved high ground. Heck, you may even wipe in front of her. Now - this will only work if you carry out 1) several times becuase she has to veiw you as a guy that listens. If she balks at the CAN TALK - bring up the fact the " I really like the way in which we can really talk now and I was hoping I could share a few things with you...". After you say those majic word, let her take position and see where it goes. But once agian, DO NOT TRY TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM!

Stuff is gold! Has to be done in sequence and with the correct wording or, like a fine gem, it will spilt at the fault line with precision and accuracy but be rendered useless.

Good Luck, don't give up, victory is ours if we all pull together like a team!