[legion]

Delay Tactics

If when put on the spot to answer a question you come up blank, then delay tactics can buy time to dream one up. These tactics are risky, because if you are not able to think of anything clever during the time you buy... you will be pinned even further.
DESCRIBE THE ANSWER:
Give descriptive attributes of the eventual answer, then pause as if expecting a response, while thinking of a real answer. When this technique is repeated the other person will appear to be begging you to give an answer.
"Excellent question, and I think the answer will startle you." (Pause, look thoughtfully as if a response is due while thinking up an answer.)
"I think the answer to your last question will clear up your confusion on this subject. (Long pause...) Are you ready?"
"I'm glad you asked. Would you like a long or a short answer?"
DESCRIBE THE QUESTION:
Same as above, only here the diversionary shift of focus is on the question.
"This question could only come from the confusion of the ______ mind-set."
"That is an interesting question coming from you. Interesting, interesting, interesting." (Pause, as if admiring the other person... )
"The question asked, is basically _______, ________, _______." (Re-state the questions in various ways, pausing for approval between each, while thinking up an answer.)
QUESTION THE QUESTION / COMMENT:
A great lead-in for the technique of WISHFUL THINKING, or a method of delay to give yourself time to think of an answer.
"Why do you ask that?"
"What drives you to make such a statement?"
BRAIN SEIZURE:
A complex statement that paralyzes the brain.
"What you inferred is not what you implied."
"Your problem is that you are thinking in a linear versus configurational framework."
WORD SALAD, a.k.a.: SESQUIPEDALIANISM:
This is a recipe for sophisticated babbling. Ingredients include: philosophic sounding words and sentence structure, unintelligible Latin terms, banal folk wisdom, jargon, catch-phrases, truisms, etc. Sprinkle lightly with a few words that appear to pertain to the subject. This will sound very impressive without really saying anything, and buy time to think of something meaty to say while your lips are flapping. In some circles such machinations can actually be passed off as an answer - or a point!
"In view of the Federal Budget Deficit, civil unrest and international politics, we need to consider that notwithstanding the mitigating circumstances, this country has got to get back on its feet. Don't you agree?"
REVERSE THE QUESTION:
Echo the question back or ask the other person a similar or difficult question. (This can be a valid technique if not used merely as a delay tactic.)
"What do you think the answer to your question is?"
"How 'bout if I ask you a similar question?"
START A STORY:
With a sparkle in your eye, start into a long-winded story which presumes to apply to the subject at hand. Continue until the other person calls your bluff, then act insulted and claim that you are not getting equal time or a fair chance to explain you case. Then, thoroughly offended, drop the cover story and start with the real answer (whatever it was you were able to think of while you were babbling). (Ronald Reagan did this a lot.)
"This reminds me of the time I was in Cucamonga. Let me tell you, it was hot! (Time to think up real answer during dramatic pauses) And we were in a small hotel when a gas leak started. Well! You can imagine how we..."
OBVIOUS ANSWER:
To give an obvious, over-literal, useless, or pun response to delay with humor.
["What is your first point?"] "My first point is point #1."
[How do you explain the difference between salaries of men and women in this company who are perfoming the exact same jobs?] "I'm not sure, but I think it has to do with gender."


Question As Opportunity


A standard response for politicians is to view any question as an opportunity to say whatever they want. The "answer" does not have to have anything to do with the "question" asked. This practice has all but killed the utility of debate and dialog in politics, and unhappily it is spreading to other areas of life as well. Following are some inconspicuous (to the uninitiated) techniques that allow a deft shift from the question subject to the desired subject.
"THIS OR THAT":
Deny that the issue is limited to the question at hand. Redefine the issue to your favorite topic.
"It is not a question of (this) or (that), but rather it is an issue of (whatever it is you want to say.)"
["Are you for or against capital punishment?"] "I don't think the issue is being for or against capital punishment, the real issue facing our country is the federal budget deficit. I propose that we... "
"X IS ONE ISSUE, Y IS ANOTHER":
Acknowledges the issue and quickly change to a new subject.
"X is certainly one topic that could be discussed, but Y is another..."
"Well, my track record is certainly one issue, but this month's agenda is another. Do you know that in the next five days..."


General Cheap Shot Tactics & Irritants

HYPOTHETICAL INSULT:
"Take this example: suppose you were a person who was incredibly stupid but was trying to come off as intelligent. What would the proper response be if you were me?"
"Let's just say that we knew for sure that you were a sexual pervert..."
COMPLIMENTARY INSULT:
"Why, that is a brilliant question coming from you!"
"You're looking less repulsive than usual today."
"Your statement is partially correct."
DISTORTED ACTIVE LISTENING:
Active listening is where you parrot back what the other person is saying in order to draw them out and to keep them talking. DISTORTED ACTIVE LISTENING parrots back what the other person is saying, but gets it all wrong, or makes it sound incredibly stupid. Similar to LUNATIC FRINGE.
"If I hear you correctly, your point is... (get it all wrong)."
"It sounds as if you are saying that torturing children is a good idea..."
NAME IT:
To the feebleminded, if there is a NAME used as a label for IT, then it must be wrong, even if it isn't. The NAME, now an "proof" of sorts, can be used as a "sledgehammer" if IT comes up again.
"The case you just made was first made by Edgar Sullivan in the late 1800's and was quickly disproved. The 'Sullivan Error' inevitably occurs to people when they first start studying the subject."
"Your line of reasoning is called the MacGregor Phenomenon."
"Why, that's Calvinism!"
I KNOW BETTER:
A clever and socially acceptable way of denying what someone has said by claiming to know more about what the other person thinks or feels than they do. Believe it or not, this technique is quite commonplace and effective.
"That's a cruel thing to say, and I know you don't mean it."
"You've made that point well, but: (1) I know where your heart is... (2) I sense that you're not comfortable with what you're saying... (3) I know what kind of person you are deep down, and that you cannot continue to hold this position and maintain your integrity."
"Johnny, the reason I can't give you permission to go to the party is because I know that deep in your heart you'd rather spend the time here with me."
SELECTIVE MEMORY:
To bring up a past event and GET IT ALL WRONG, or even make up a past event. The intent is to get the other person confused, angry, and defensive.
"You never admit defeat. Remember that chess game I beat you in?" (The one you lost...)
"But last week (or a minute ago) you said the opposite! Make up your mind!"
"Remember last time we had an argument and you turned out to be wrong and you wouldn't admit it? Now we are in the same spot we were last time."
STUDIES HAVE SHOWN:
When all else is lost, refer to a phony study that supports your case. This is a bet the other person will not call your bluff. Does he/she know for certain the study didn't happen? The usual response is "I have not seen or heard of this study", further discrediting the other person as not doing comprehensive study of available source material.
"Research at UCLA has proven conclusively..."
"I know the idea sounds unorthodox, but the recent study at Harvard has substantiated this view."
REPEAT OFFENDER, a.k.a. SLOGAN RESPONSES:
The repeated use of an assertion, truism, bad joke, or even physical gesture when used to the point of extreme irritation.
"The customer comes first!" ["But what about our profit?"] "The customer comes first! ["But they don't have any money!"] "The customer... (etc., etc., etc.)"
["What do you think?"] "It's crazy." (wave arms while stating.) ["What is that supposed to mean?"] (wave arms wildly) ["Huh?"] (repeat as necessary.)
KNEE JERK:
"I would like to answer your question directly, but considering your (1) past reactions... (2) ability to cope with the truth... (3) emotional instability... I feel that to do so would be a disservice to you at this time." [Other person gets (justifiably) upset.] "See, what did I tell you. You are flying off the handle already!"