[Oh Haha]

Wow, that sucks!!!
Gonna throw a couple ideas at you. Did you cycle the caliper pristons in each caliper before bleeding again? You may have one side pushing the pads out before the other side. Remove the pads and replace with a thin piece of wood or metal to prevent the pistons coming all of the way out.
Have a helper SLOWLY push the brake pedal until the pistons move out a bit. Do this a few times for each caliper. After doing this, bleed the calipers again using the helper/pump method.


If this procedure doesn't help, then i would think your master cylinder has problems. If the problem is exactly the same as before, I would look there.
Hope this helps, man. I did my brakes this year and ran into a few problem along the way but worked them out. No, it wasn't the same problem as yours.