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Ryan, what is ptsd? post trau stress dis?
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yep..post traumatic stress disorder. doctor feels some have a predisposition to handling stress either more 'internally' or 'externally'..unfortunately, i'm inthe former group. i worked for several airlines flying lears in an on-demand format, wearing the pager for years..when it sounds you've got 15 minutes ot get to the airport, 45 minutes to get everything and your co-pilot squared away and 'wheels up'. most of the time, after moving into int'l air ambo missions, i was out of the country. last company i flew for, i was one of 6 captains when first hired..and was the last captain around before i quit. poor maintenance led to one too many 'close calls'..one in particular that left me kind of messed up, so i had to call it quits. you could say i just did a few 'bad flights' too many. so in my case it was a combo of chronic stress for years combined with a couple near-death episodes with myself in charge. long story, that's the 'thumbnail sketch'. i still have periodic panic-related episodes now that have nothing to do with flying..the response was just so reinforced over the years, that many different situations can bring them on. they 'shrink' your life. i went from being very outgoing, always on the go, to being at home 95% of the time. it sucks ass..
ryan