There's always one crackpot in the bunch that makes everyone look up and say "what the?! Oh, never mind, it was just the village idiot babbling on about something idiotic again."
Anyway...
Livi, all I can say is that I completely agree with the responses you've gotten so far (with one strange exception). I have been happily married for 19 years and can honestly say that manipulation of one's spouse has no place in a healthy relationship. Get out now or you will end up bitter and hateful toward her for having ruined your life.
Sorry to be so frank with you, Livi. Good luck to you.