[M.D. Holloway]

Welcome to the fold! Your membership card will arive shortly. In the meantime, please memorize our song. You will be asked to sing it at the next national convention with 10,000 other converts!

We're all Republicans now,
We've all come around somehow.
Even old Democrats can change their hats,
We're all Republicans now.
Affirmative action must go,
Unless you're somebody we know.
We'll get conservative judges back on the bench,
Cut government spending and down with the French,
No more arguments, we've taken a vow,
No more dissent, just smile and bow.

We're all Republicans,
All Republicans, All Republicans now.

We're all Republicans now,
We've turned to the right, and how!
We are one land,
One old party that's grand,
We're all Republicans now.
We're opposed to the power of the state,
Our motto is deregulate,
No more free health care here in our nation,
Why should I pay for your kid's education?
If you can't afford to pay your own way
Then you don't belong in the U.S.A.

We're all Republicans,
All Republicans, All Republicans now.

We're all Republicans now,
And America's stronger, ka-pow.
If you're unemployed
Don't be annoyed,
We're all Republicans now.
We're all united tonight
'Cause it feels so good to be right.
Put your nose to the grindstone, your hand to the plow,
Get out to the barn and find a cash cow.
When the sign lights up that says, "Applause",
Clap your hands and smile because,
We're all Republicans,
All Republicans, All Republicans now.