[EMBPilot]

The airplanes have log books where maintenance items are tracked. the pilots write up the discrepancy and the mechanics are required to address the issue written in the response next to the write up...
(P) stands for the problem the pilots entered in the log,
(S) stands for the corrective action taken by the mechanics.


P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.


P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
S: There is no autoland installed on this aircraft.


P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.


P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on backorder.


P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200-fpm descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.


P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.


P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.


P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for!


P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.


P: Suspected crack in windscreen.
S: Suspect you're right.


P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.


P: Radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed radar with words.


P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.