[livi]

This dilemma is divided into two different issues.

First, the practical question of setting things strait with the school. Important, but of less magnitude in the long run for your son.

Second, and more important. Make absolutely sure that you have convinced your son that you believe in him. That you are on his side. The background for this is obvious but is also rooted deep down in child psychology regarding attachment and bonding.

The child has a supreme need of person(s) to rely on from birth. To protect them as it were. These persons form an attachment hierarchy for the child, where mom or dad usually is number one.

As long as the child feels safe and protected by 'number one' she will be alright in most circumstances. Even if the rest of the world is hostile. In the long run this is paramount.

This is of course just obvious ranting, clear to everyone. What I want to say, I think, is that as long as you are there for your son, he will be OK.