Quote:
Originally posted by dd74
The truth is all of us are racists. As enlightened as we want to be, we simply cannot get beyond our tribal and/or protective instincts of our own.
Sure, you may be appalled by the thought of putting on a white hood and robe and participating in a lynching. But if your daughter brought home a gang banger/hip hop/rapper type that had as many rings, hooks, and barbs in his face as Denis Rodman, and a (perceived) bad attitude at that, racism might very well kick in. And who is to say one's at fault if it does?
Protection of loved ones vs. racial enlightenment? I don't know, that's a very hard call, IMO.
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Speak for yourself. And I'm not "utopian" either as someone else described.
While my background hardly qualifies for any special protection (100% German and German/American on both sides), I did chose a 100% Chinese/American women for my wife -- and thankfully she reciprocated. It's not that I have anything special for Asian women as opposed to Caucasions, my previous girlfriend was as WASP as they come. It's just that she was the right women for me, and I've been thankful to be married to her every day since then.
My wife's parents still speak Chinese at home unless they are addressing me. My wife and I both laugh about how she used to often be given the bill to total and divy up when a large group of people went out -- because everyone knows that Asians are good at math!
When we were younger we both used to get the stares from the locals when we held hands while walking through Chinatowns. One of the few Chinese words that I know is "lo-fan" which means non-Chinese, and is not particularly complimentary.
My mother even gave me a bit of a cautionary lecture when we first got engaged about what would happen to the kids since they would be neither Asian nor Caucasion. Our response when this subject came up was was that they'd be beautiful for who they are, not for their ethnic group. But they would be lucky to have two very different cultural backgrounds to draw upon. Both girls are quite happy to describe that they are "half Chinese, half German, and all American". They're just as happy with chop-sticks and wearing chimsums (SP? the long form-fitting Chinese dress) as they are learning German and wearing Derndles (German folk dresses). Thankfully in our local public school their class-mates have comparably diverse ethnic backgrounds from all 6 populated continents. One of my daughter's best friends last year was Indian (sub-continent, not Native American). My wife and I agreed that he was a great kid and were sorry to learn that they didn't share a class this year.
The first time that I filled out a census form after my kids were born, I got really frustrated because there about 20 different special groups to identify with, and a person was expected to pidgeon-hole themselves into only one. Sure that's easy for my wife and I, but not for the girls. After thinking about it for a minute or two, I just jumped down to the "other" category and wrote in "Human" -- because that's the only group that matters.
I work for companies which are predominantly Asian. They are owned by Asians, run by Asians and predominantly staffed by Asians. Guess what -- I'm the minority. Is that a problem for me? Nah. I am who I am, and try to provide the most value that I can for my position. If I can bring in the sales, I'm neither American, Chinese or Malaysian -- I'm a salesman who books orders. It's not because of my race that I do or don't -- it's because of me.
I see racial prejudices every day. But that doesn't mean that we have to be defined by them. That only happens if we give in to the prejudices -- both our own and the other person's. I try to make a point to consider each person for their ideas and individual value. To be honest, in some people it's hard to find much of either. But I do try.
If I feel that someone is prejudiced against me, I don't let it get me down. In some cases I find it funny. I'm not going to let someone else's narrow view of me constrain my life. I am who I want to be.