[Grady Clay]

Stefanie,

Thank you. You are the experienced person I need to talk to. Feel free to email me at gradyclayathotmaildotcom.

“you mentioned something about limited capacity... in what way do you mean this? does he suffer from any developmental disabilities and does he have a mental health dx?
if he has a mental health dx along the lines of mental retardation (as ref. to in the DSM IV) or developmental disabilities he may be eligible for vocational rehab programs. Also as an adult the local social service agency should have an adult protective services division or something along those lines who can help a developmentally challanged adult.”
I have testing that shows this when he was an older teen (15-17). He was hospitalized several times with depression and other. At 17 he would curl up in my lap and weep. I get the feeling he would do that again.

”the second thing to think about is if you want to be a legal guardian for him (yet again). If an adult can be deemed 'unable to provide informed care for and protection of themselves' they can be appointed a guardian in court. this could be as small as a power of attorney or as big as a legal guardian. the benefit of this is that you would be like a legal parent for him, systems would ref to you for permission to do things with him, pay bills, make legal dec. etc. however, you would have to prove in court that he needs this. usually the local dept. of social services would bring the matter to court so you would not rec. hiring an attorney... but he would need to either vol. allow this or you would have to have it court ordered to have him declared incompetent... which brings in a psy to eval him”
Thursday I’m going to ask him to sign a General POA and the specific ones dealing with IRS, county Human Services and SSA. At some point I’m going to see that he is evaluated. I don’t want to be a conservator and I don’t think (with my lame ability) he needs that (yet).

”was he ever formally adopted? or did he age out of foster care?”
No, he aged out.

”most states offer adoption assistance for a child up until a certain age. not sure about colorado age limits but he could quailify for some grants, financial assistance or college payment schorl. if so...”
Many of these services are still available to adults here. He wants to get his GED. That is another good sign of his determination to make things better. More education is readably available but first things first.

”i would def. find out what paperwork he signed with his ex.... if he is obligated to pay child support, did he sign over his parental rights, etc.”
I agree. I’m being careful treading here because I detect some sensitivity. This will probably all come out in the next week or few.

”without having the child in his home is not eligible for a lot of social services such as food stamps, etc.... unless he is a disabiled adult... which brings us back to the possibility of a dev. disability. he could try to get SSI if he can prove he is disabiled... usually you apply twice for SSI and on the third time you hire an attorney, who you usually do not pay up front, they take out of the payment later if approved. not sure how not paying taxes would affect that... but def. something to check into

again if he has a dev. dx he should be eligible for adult social services and usually those include heating assistance, sometimes food stamps, and possibly if he gets SSi insurance.”
I can’t tell this yet. The theory I have been advised to follow is to have him apply for SS Disability. He will be initially denied as you noted. The next step is the 3341 Appeal that apparently everyone has to do. Apparently during this process he can receive evaluation and benefits he needs.

”if his lic was revoked he must have two or more DUI's or something along those lines. he should have had a court appointed attorney in that matter... if he completes the 12 classes he can apply for a provisional drive lic. of course insurance is high with a DUI.. but he could legally drive to work, etc. alot of times too the sooner he pays his probation fees the sooner he can get off probation....”
In the short term I’m not too worried about this. I think there are some serious issues that need to be resolved before he applies for a driver’s license renewal.

”anything else???”
Probably so. I learn a huge amount each time we talk. I suspect there are some serious unresolved issues that I don’t know about (yet).

Stefanie, thank you so much for chiming in. I really can use your help in understanding the situation and properly interfacing with the agencies.

This afternoon I talked to a lady who exemplifies “a$$ ho!e bureaucrat”. I know who she works for here in Denver. Almost everyone I have talked to, realizing my position, have been extremely helpful. It is very gratifying to see that.

Best,
Grady