[notfarnow]

If things are sour, are you obligated to spend time with him at Christmas?

Don't know about you, but in our families Christmas always seemed to bring problems and tensions to a boiling point. High expectations and the need to pretend like everything's great, coupled with bitterness and resentment. Oh joy.

It may seem cold, but wifey and I have made a pact to NOT expose ourselves, or the people we care about, to poisonous people... even if they are family, and even if it is at Christmas.

This has caused tension in both my family and hers, but we have made our home a "safe haven" where disfunctional, unkind behaviors and attitudes are not allowed. Funny, seems we have more and more people coming to our place for Christmas each year.