[rammstein]

You should check your poop after it comes out.

If it all floats, its possible that you are eating too much fat. Its also possible that you ate too much 'gassy' food and there's a lot of air bubbles in it.

If its all hard and hurty, you are probably not drinking enough water.

If its black, you should go to a doctor- you might be bleeding inside. Caveat- if you take pepto, that makes you turn black too. Kinda cool if you look at it, you can see it turn to black indicating when you took it. Kinda like looking back into time!

If you see corn, it means you ate corn.

If more comes out than seems possible, you were probably drunk last night and don't recall eating half of the kitchen.

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