[MRM]

Forget about it. My mother gave the family farm to my brother over my objection and request to pay for it. This was despite the fact that the difference between selling the farm to me and giving it to my brother is the difference between comfortably spending summers up north and winters down south and eating mac and cheese for the rest of her life. Eventually she told me that my wife and I did well enough that we didn't need the help and that she wanted to give it to him and didn't care if it hurt my feelings.

I don't talk to that side of my family any more. If you want to go that route, keep involved and keep telling everyone to stop insisting on being stupid. If you want to keep talking to the folks and the brother, insist on not talking about it at all and keep repeating that their dealings are between them and you will not get involved.

Either way, your parents will insist on doing what they are already doing and nothing you say will ever change them. I have no regrets about how things turned out with my family as I am much better off not talking to them. Maybe you'll find yourself in the same situation.