[sammyg2]

I fought alot when I was young, in high school I probably got in a fight a month or more.
No one ever wins a fight but I usually ended up better off. A few times I ended up pretty beat up but it healed.
I had a rep as a tough guy and a bully. My three brothers were the same way, no one who knew us messed with us when we were all together unless they were suicidal. I'm 6'2" and I was the runt of the family. I almost had to live up to the rep. Being the smallest of the three brothers who loved to fight made me a bit short tempered and quick to react.

In college I got in a few fights, mostly at frat partied with *********s who couldn't handle their beer.
In my 20's I started to get to the point where I actually had something to loose.
I backed away from a few stupid fights but still got into more than I should.
One day (around 30 years old) I realized the only reason I fought was because of ego and insecurity. It was almost never because of self defence. I could have walked away or backed down in most instances.
I had a house, a good paying job, and was more secure in myself, and that's also about the time I started going to church.
Fighting started to seem seem stupid and childish.
I still have most of that same bad temper and the mentality of a bully but I don't act upon those emotions anymore.
Last year I was challenged by a troublemaker, calling me a ****** cracker and all sorts of thing. I knew I could hurt him real bad and teach him a lesson without taking much damage at all if any, but I backed down and let it go.
It was hard. Real hard. The ego part of me was still there and I was very angry, It took about a week to pass before I stopped being angry and started feeling good about it.
I hope I'll never get in another fight but deep down inside, the animal is still there. the only difference is that I'm in control now instead of him.

Some might suggest that I'm not much of a christian because of that but if I hadn't found my faith I'd be alot worse of a person than I am now. Jesus didn't come for the saints, he came for the sinners (like me).