[johnco]

actually he's my radiation guy and I've only seen him2 or 3 times. his nurses strap me down and light me up. I think I saw him monday and that's before it got bad. chemo and radiation merged together at that point, but it wasn't bad at that time. he gave me lid/nystatin/mylantra/benadryl. it helps some but the afternoon/night after I get nuked it gets worse. since I get it 5 days a week, it tore me up starting wed/thurs. not sure. actually I don't remember the last couple weeks. anyway.. I haven't slept much and have eaten even less. the first week was nothing. didn't notice any change. second week it all comes together and by then I'm dazed and confused. 8-10 hours sleep and one donut eaten the entire week kind of makes you goofy, forgetful. some pain and aggravation but nothing I couldn't handle. bad during the night but by appointment time, I'm so zoned out I couldn't tell you if I drove there or not. last night bad.. by the time I got there today, I was sort of there, sort of not.. doctor not there for script.. by the time I got into the car.. well I sat there 10 minutes trying to get control. the hour ride home ending in a fiery crash would have been welcome relief. I'll have to wait till monday to get this sorted out. I do have pain meds. I get them filled every time I get a script, but they just sit there for years. I say hello to pain almost every day, but after a while I forget he's there.. it's nothing I can't handle