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When I found out my thought screen helmet was missing, I started yelling at Mother..."Mother what did you do with my thought screen helmet...I paid good money for it and its very special.. do you know what you just did... now the Aliens will be able to control my every thought my every action." Mother looked at me and responded, "Well its about time something got you under control, God only knows I tried and the Aliens are welcome to you, I hope they come and take you away." Since that day the Aleins when they are in town have been pursuing my mind relentessly, I find drinking Single Malt Scotch messes up their thought wave patterns and they actually get vicariously drunk.. and they just can't handle it. Thats when your most likely to see them and that explains their erratic flight paterns they are flying DUI.