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you said that she has been your step daughter for a short time...
how is your relationship with her... are you friends? do you guys talk?
being the new guy is always a little bit hard... maybe it would help
if you could show her that you can talk with her without being judgemental
at all...kids appreciate when adults dont show judgement to them...
how is her relationship with her mom? where is her father?
what was her prior relationship with her father?
the counciling is important...but do it as a family and dont push it on her
good luck it is great that you care...
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