Well this has certainly been a year of hard knocks for us and unfortunately it ended last night in a very bad manner. Warning long rant to follow...
To achieve success/happiness on a baseball team requires much more than effort and devotion from the players. It also hinges on navigating the murky political waters of play time and coaches/favorites kids. My son is also handicapped with a Dad who never played ball and came about as green as they come. No prior experience = zero credibility. I'm generally a pretty good judge of character but realized last night that I was way way wrong on this one.
Zack finished the '07 season with his team and was invitied to return in Jan '08 playing as 11U. In the off season the team broke away from the recreational league and joined a local group of 8 travel teams from 9U to 14U. The season started off very well for my son. Three of the coaches kids were unavailable for the first 5 games so Zack got lots of play. He was hitting .400 (3rd highest on the team) with 30 plate appearances, played 4 of the 6 innings, and rarely made an error in the field. His confidence was swelling and we could not be prouder.
Things began to change when the coaches boys and their friends, this team has been together for many years, recovered from various injuries and commitments to start rotating into the line up. No problem, I know my son is not the best player, but he is easily as good as half the other kids. Zack's playtime dropped to 2 innings, then 1, then none, and was a stranger to the batting lineup. Boys hitting .125 were given priority and if Zack did make the lineup it was dead last. He remained hopeful and optimistic...
Things got really bad at our first big tournament in PHX. Out of 4 games Zack played 3 innings and got 3 at bats. Hummm...this really sucks. The coaches response was "I play the boys who I'm most confident in". Not much a Dad can do with that other than spend more time at the field and offer the team any/all assistance.
Back at home Zack really stepped up at the team practices (the only boy to not miss a single BP or field practice) and the coaches were always quick to praise him. We played a local game and he was given opportunity which he converted into 2 dbls, 4 rbi, a walk, and 6 outs at LF and CF.
This weekend we played another tournament and in the first early morning game Zack lost a ball into the sun in LF that scored a run. He hit a long shot to RF that was caught out and walked. Coaches were fuming on the error and benched him as punishment. The team went on to play 5 more games and win their division and in that time Zack got 3 pinch hit opportunities. He struck out twice and on his lone double was replaced with a different base runner.
The really difficult thing to watch, as a parent, is for your kid to walk on egg shells worried about an error while the starting crew make multiple errors every game and get a pass as your son gets benched. I feel his coaches handled the situation incredibly poorly this weekend and it came to a head in the championship game. Before the game I offered Zack the option of going home but he insisted he wanted to stay and support his team. He was breaking inside and tears streamed from his face as he whispered "I have to try...maybe the coach will let me bat one more time". I was wrecked with grief and wanted to save him but I let him make the call.
At the top of the final inning, with zero play time, we made eye contact in the dugout. I gave him a thumbs up and he smiled weakly and turned away. I suddenly realized this was completely insane. I was letting the coaching staff get away with child abuse in front of my nose. I walked calmly to the dugout and told him to gather his things, it was not his fault, and that the team did not deserve a boy with his heart and courage. The coaches stood there listening but not really paying attention.
I took my son home and you know what? Despite loving the game, achieving his dream of playing with the *big dogs*, he didn't look back. In the parking lot we could hear the cheers as his team made the final out and won the tournament and he looked to me and replied "My coaches think I'm worthless. I don't want to play with them anymore".
This is going to take some time to repair but we will get through it. The one thing they did not damage is his love for the game. He begged me to just throw with him when we got home and we did until it became too dark for my 45 yr eyes to see the ball.
I am disgusted with the coaching staff. I thought I had measured them correctly but in the end all four of them failed my son as coaches and more importantly as humans. We are now officially taking a break, preparing for the upcoming pop-warner season, and will probably re enter the recreational league for 12U. Thanks for letting me vent.
Love ya Zack!
