[Kurt B]

What's wrong with folks kissing Jack's ass? I kiss ass all day long. I kiss my project lead's ass. I kiss my manager's ass. I even pucker up big and smile for the director of finance in his minions and kiss their ass as long as I need to.

If you ask me, learning how to seriously kiss some ass is MIA in our American Education system--along with math, reading, and science. A good grammar curriculum will feature a healthy amount of ass kissing.
Generally though, most folks don't learn how to really do it until they're in the workforce, and by then a person's most valuable learning years have been wasted.

My children, if I have any, will know how to kiss ass better than any other kids at their school. I promise.

Kurt Junior:

Reading: B
Math: A-
Puckering up and smooching like there's no tomorrow: A

We can all learn a lot from good @ss kissers, so don't be afraid to lean over, pucker up real big, and smooch some ass once in a while.

BUT, in all seriousness I didn't in any way see this thread as an ass kissing thread--BigBPainta went from somewhat tolerable to complete nuisance faster than WideBody's 3.6 hits 60MPH...but hey, we can't all be socially functional, can we?