[legion]

My friend Griffin had an in-ground pool (a rarity in Illinois).

When we were in high school, we'd all crowd his house during the summer. One night, his mom was out of town and all of the neighborhood crew had turned out. We'd lost track of the time. We'd been swimming for house. It could be 9:00 p.m. or 1:00 a.m. We had no idea. And we were wet and all of us had neglected to bring towels, so going inside the house to check was not an option.

One girl, Randi, said: "I can tell the time by the moon."

My friend Matt, who was out of the pool at the time, promptly dropped his shorts and aimed his posterior at Randi, saying: "Hey Randi, what time is it?"